••-vrVji *1*-" I MOWER COUNTY NEWS,: AUSTIN, MINN. Page Four w.»- up Monday, June 26, 1922. «'*•.. i*T" r*' ir^"* fOUND!IN HAILS of th£ flower Conn 7,"Snake-E|Urs Avoid Venom.*• Jordan .Animals which eat snakes—the Spencer •The County Pspei* hedge ^Qg,^ |Mcf eagles, etc.—neve* Published -every 'Monday and Thursday, M" eat the head of a poisonous snake, at Austin. Minnesota, if Funeral Director. according to J. Beyer, whose German Many Things Are Forwarded Besides t- ROE AND GANNON, Publisher* articles on venomous snakes is translated The Establishment^ of CARL L. WEICHT, City Editor! Correspondence. 3 in the Scientific American. Service. —_ -iriR Superintendent of Philadelphia Post :'Dr. B. T. Johnson V/ office Tells of Some Amusing ExO. r: J. DENTIST a periences He Had Had. Office over Wold Drug Store. Every one who haS* watched the DIAL 2603 crowd collect in front of the parcel post window at holiday time knows ^Dealer In that the jpali lias a more or less humorous side, remarks the Philadelphia COAL, WOOD, LIME, Northwestern Advertising Representatives: Record. How humorous it can be you Infallible IdentificaBureau" Minnesota Select List, 215 do not realize till you begin to find CEMENT SEWER PIPE, South Sixth Street, Minneapolis out about it. 709 Exchange Bank, St. Paul. BRICK AND WALL Mr. Johnson, the superintendent of Tn case of Theft or Robbery, let mails at the central postoffice, knows. SUBSCRIPTION RATES PLASTER. us investigate for you." He has 27 years' experience. Per Year, in advance ...$2.50 "Did the crying baby ever go through Six Months^ $1.25 CONSULTING FINGER­ Single Copies 05 the mails?" the reporter questioned PRINT EXPERT Foreign subscriptions, per year. 3.50 him. n- Office 301 East Bridge St. Mr. ^Johnson shook his head. "No, UNOe.RwC'vn Entered as Second Class Matter at For terms and information— -the only live things allowed are live Phone: Main 32 the Post office at Austin, Minn., under chicks and bulbs. Everything else under LOCK BOX 43, the act of March 3, 1879. the sun does go. Sometimes very Austin, Minn. Austin, Minn. humorous and pathetic incidents occur. CHOOSING A TREASURER Here is a most remarkable view of the Thames at.night, taken during the recent heat wave, when the atmosphere "An old Virginia mammy wanted to 6f the usually foggy city was startlingly clear. On the left bank are the houses of parliament. If the county board ,as present ship herself home parcel post. Every indications develop, fails to Christmas she had received a nice THE PRIMARY SYSTEM has he failed to do the right MICKIE SAYS fat package through the mail. It appoint Miss Olive Cooley as WHO thing by you. He thinks you meant direct communication with her Voters are due to have a treasurer of Mower county to are the greatest bOy on earth, own people. She pictured Christmas brief respite from the rigors -m' eo\TOa seuos ue our fill the unexpired term of S. MADE bar, none* even tho you pliaster down on the plantation In all the rosy and disappointments of a primary A. Smith, it will be laying itself [HERE TD OViS£ glow of her far-off childhood. She your hair back, wear smart campaign during the lull open to the accusation \U A \WK\UE BUY jesr craved to go back and she didn't clothes, smoke cigarettes, and that invariably follows a primary THEM that it is counting politics as BEtVIEEM VME VWE TWUKSJ know how to go. She had just enough fail to bring home a cent. He is election and immediate more important in the balance brains to-know that she was too ignorant WE RUKimVA* PASER \V4 the man jvho won the love and ly precedes the beginning of against safety of public interests. to take the long Journey by BEST W eoOVJTtWHl life partnership of the greatest operations for the finals in November. herself. So she came to her mistress. Ssl HE SVUEMRS VAO^OOM woman on earth, your Most American fortunes have been made "'Couldn't I just be labeled an' Miss Cooley as deputy treasurer 40VJUERES VAftS GOV mother, stamped an' weighed,' she demanded, by those who possess them. It is not amiss to stop for a of Mower county is the is so an a 'and sent along back to Virginny with moment to contemplate just *one person most intimately acquainted OF the postman? I'd like to give myself "Ihe old man." They earned money, but saving part was what the net results were of with the duties and as a Christmas present to .my If you win as good a wife as what counted most. 1 the affairs of the office. She the expenditure of money and folks this year.' he did, you will have to go is the logical choice as treasurer, the investment of energy that "Humorous, but pathetic as well some.—The Artisan. Few save fortunes, but many save for fortunes. the primary election entailed. and the county board will isn't it?" It is becoming increasingly Mr. Johnson talks like a Virginian not overlook the fact that the and has a true gift of telling a story. evident^ and the light vote principle involved is not one WELL, DID YOU tAKE A savings account has meant a fortune to "A negro said there were three kinds of political preferment but demonstrates it more clearly EVER?— pm of pies, the clvered, the uncivered many a man, because he had the money rather a question of what is than anything else, that the KlUOOC and the barred. We have to do with prevailing system of selecting Movies at the right moment. THE AUSTIN NATIONAL the safest course of action-—to the barred variety. In a country district oft choose one who is not acquainted nominees for county offices is BANK invites your account. The county board was deeply humiliated some one made the most beautiful with the office or to not a very satisfactory one. barred apple pie. They decided to Saturday when County Auditor Voters of this county, and of BdSBfC select the deputy whose five send it through the mails to a friend Simmons stepped into the engineer's THE AUSTIN NATIONAL BANK every other county, for that in Philadelphia. Great was their years' experience eminently office and said in a telephone MA(U§ trust. They put a string through one matter, have seldom gone to fit her for the post. conversation, "I hope to get rid of the of the bars. Tied on a label with the the polls with as little knowledge The ridiculous charge that board some time this morning." Commissioner of Austin, Minn. name and address and the proper of the long lists of candidates selection of Miss Cooley would Hotson said that the first amount of postage. Put the pie in a give her a political advantage as they have this year. Member Federal Reserve System. thing "0. J." knew the board, would pleplate and sent it off on its journey. over her opponent for office is We have no quarrel with "That pie arrived in perfect condition. be getting rid of him. J. L. MITCHELL, P. D. BEAULIEU, W. E. HOPFE, completely and effectively refuted, the direct primary system. In It had appealed to the humorous President Vice President Cashier it seems to us, in view of sense of the clerks and had been theory it is an excellent piece According to a wit it is libel to the fact that failure to do so handed from one man to the next of legislation, a most perfect say that women lack a sense of' with the greatest care." would be putting her in a very principle of democracy. But humor. He says, "If they Mr. Johnson also had amusing, experiences unsatisfactory light and could we wonder if the same can be couldn't take a joke, how few of when he worked in the railway not but give her opponent a GRAPEFRUIT IS SQUIRTLESS said of it in actual practice. them' would ever get lharried." mails. Bags collected at the rural distinct advantage. The direct primary is to allow stations often contain queer guests. Thotless people are inclined Tangelo Is Cross Between Orange Tangerine ^the voters themselves to "I have seen a clerk open a bag and It was only his family that stood to favor an entirely new personnel and Grapefruit—Delicious select the nominees for office a small snake come out," continued in the way of H. J. Boyd and a place etc in. the treasurer's office, .. When Ripe. Mr. Johnson merrily "whenever that upon whom they will ballot at en the ticket for commissioner in the without taking cognizance of happens they look as if they-had been the final election. .However, second district. If Mr. Boyd's wife ^quirtless grapefruit Is a. novelty struck by green lightning. the condition that actually existed the question instantly presents and son had voted he would have tied under the attention of the Department "The bag had been put down somewhere there at the time the itself, if that is the case, what I THE UNIVERSAL CAR with D. C. McKee in Monday's primary. of Agriculture. It is called the tangelo, and somehow the snake had present unfortunate situation of the fifty or more percent a cross between the orange tangerine As it was he received 308 managed to creep in. became known. Miss Cooley who never go to the polls-at all and the grapefruit. Walker T. votes to 310 for McKee. "At places too small for the express served only as deputy, and the on primary election day? And Swingle, physiologist in charge, and to stop, the mail bag is hung out alleged errors were made after T. Balph Robinson, crop physiologist in that question is the flaw, ofperhaps on an iron crane. The postal clerk This is the distorted view of an her work on the books had of the department, state in a bulletin grabs it and throws out another as we should say one exchange: "Massachusetts man oi that these resemble round oranges been completed. the train goes by. I had just taken the flaws, in the primary syst who speaks ten languages has more than either-of their parents. off a pouch and opened it when out The county board will do tem.' just married a woman who There are two-varieties, the Sampson stepped a chicken. Not a day-old well to choose Miss Cooley as How many voters go to the and the Thorntoii. The former chicken, but a good-sized bird. You speaks only seven, but we'll bet treasurer of Mower county if polls on primary election day? has disappointed those who tasted it could have knocked me over with a on the lady." it wishes to place in charge of There is_, unquestionably, a because they mistook its ripe appearance feather when I saw that fowl." the affairs of the- office a conscientious, growing antipathy against too and ate it before it was mature. Most any man can be an editor. All efficient, and wellinformed many elections. They are ex•pensive, It is delicious when fully ripe, "with Suffers for Heroism. the editor has to do is sit at his desk official. and the voter grants a rather acid, sprightly flavored, aromatic, Sergt. Willie Sandlin of Devil's six days a week, fpur weeks in the soft and juicy deep orange colored^ Jumo Branch, Leslie county, is suffering to cut down taxes. They decrease month, and twelve months in the year pulp." a serious lung affection as the the efficiency of the official Dredging the river near the and edit such stuff as this: "Mrs. The Thornton has "very pale orange result of gas inhaled while in the Argonhe who must leave his work bathing beach and stirring up Jones of Cactus t£reek let a can-opener colored Juice and sprightly ^flfiifpredj for^fet, lie was told when he visited to campaign for re-election or ^the mud and mire where Austin *580 pulp. It has little aclgity and resembles Ricliniond, Ky., for examination slip last weekTraoi^cut herself in risk losing his position, an undesirable boys and girls may have full by ^overnihaent physicians. jgteii^pr,Sood-^rorect^ orang$: the pantry. A mischievous lad on condition in either benefit of the filth thereby uncovered, more^ran $ ^KpefriwE of tangerin^ Sergearit Sandlin, advancing in Pikton threw a stone and cut Mr. case. may be a good engineering It may be eaten out of hand, like a command of a platoon at Bois de Pike in the alley last Tuesday. Joe And the average voter does project, but it looks as tangerine, but is doubtless better when Forger, France, September 26, 1918, Doe climbed on the roof of his house not pay enough attention to halved and eaten like grapefruit. It kept on when discovery of a machinegun tho it were woefully lacking last week looking for a leak, and fell, requires no sugar, and the pulp is so nest brought a command to halt. the primary. He doesn't realize from a sanitation standpoint. striking himself on the back porch. tender it tan be removed with a spoon In one day he destroyed three machine-gun that the two men selected If it is necessary to do the While" Harold Green was escorting #ithtwt ^.cutting ^e segments morether^ nests, killed 24 Germans, Most for Your Money by it will be the choice for the dredging work now, the beach captured six machine guns and a hospital Miss Violet ^Yise fro'myc .social -is little^or notjendency for office in the final election. He should be closed until the water group, killing the German lieutenant last Saturday night a sava! le^jofcelt^jsquirt whe^fthe spoon Is doesn't stop to "consider thaj is in fit condition in which with his own gim. Inserted ifi. the segment." tacked thej$|ji •anqiV both men chosen should be ..Sergeant Sandlin was awarded the |o swim andrfrghp rj &e ®!ri goocjfmeri. for fear that ttil -a*? Congressional. Wunmn^Cre6k was il^mgT^j poorer "of "th$ twtr will be the Qroix de. Guerre And rmmember—the lowest1 fv A SAFE DECISION. qat Friday first coat, the Joweat upkeep Mllitaire andT ^gtjoja final choice. from General itad the Jk4tesftoMalpSiWJM The board of-, managers of jj&e verajnjia^li Pershing and'l^arshai of car Confronted by a long list of may' motor ever bailt. the Mower County Fair assoc-. fplaiie Sessinjj^-l^lfcung' colt IasfHSaturdayi cafodiifates of whoise fitness for 5..^* In Novel Contest, No pother ear of this type is iation do not pose -r|pr/ei&t had the misfortune to be kicked un^ .Natural Colored Silk. Officfe -fie knows little the voter upon the people of tftfe cotinty der the corn crib." Experiments made in France, it is priced so low no other will too frequently decides that The eaglet according to' aeronauts, reported, show that the jrellow and any of the cheap amusement it isn't necessary for him to remains nbt merely the king of birds,: green colors possessed by the silk give you more real motor car and degrading influences that vote at the- primary for he'll A KODAK ON THE but in flying quality the swiftest of spun by certain caterpillars are- due accompany a street carnival all birds. A French "flyer" from the have another chance at, the value—more convenience, more to coloring matter derived from the' HIGHWAY- and they have therefore harred French, naval station at Salonica in fall election anyway. food and passed through the blood of comfort, more dependability from the 1922 fair any carnival February, 1916, had a match ^Jth an 'the spinners. When that belief has been eagltif^near. Mo9nt|6lympus. T^e eagle or (Copyr 1922, HadleyrHodgson any show similar to those By impregnating leaves with artificial eliminated from the minds Of than a Ford Coupe. Equipped conned of the Service.) usually included in carnivals. colors, the experimenters caused the voters-—and most Assuredly ,.v Those who have come in with electric starting and lighting some/ species of caterpillars ~to produce not until- then—will the direct If a man agp'y in bn'g sit^^ehapfcy Mgle," "i wifm. 'foiio contact with- carnivals know silk of bright orange-yellow and primary function as an efficient writes |^|||inaiid' uation, he 'At a dishine system, demountable rims, fine fose hues. their evils and their destructive 7 tance system *of selecting the in any others By the aid of the spectroscope the influence. When all is said, extra fim and non-skid tires all jrasma^^phfer 60 nau- nomin^s for public office. iL {aim presence and nature of colored plgpments they da no one but their proprietor K* ym»l T^ worl3las ^a^ in the blood of the littlel creatures aroundl, it makes the ideal enclosed-car any good they thrust 'with us the bird erfecf ost of them genuine. A fellow can't were established.—Washington -Si..- DAD*. low forms of amusement upon at^ standstill that I was able to pKM ow too many, for business or for Star. tograph^t fl^th ^an^igcposure of a huf many good people ^fgoldoihot 2jj HS |aJfWwear a last yea second, as "was cloudy, apd pleast^ Reasonably prdriipt desire them, but blmjfly permit What is BrotKe^Wefl?^WBy, it^if straw hat his flhger nails ml Birthday Cake Candles. jthe plate gave an absolutely neat |pproduction. them: Fathers andMothers Mn arrangement whereby you don't need^ ihaiiicuringr his vest mfy The custom of placing candles on a delivery. Terms if desired should be particularly interested have to walk hang a little loose and his: birthday cake—one for each year— "For two mlnutes 4:he bird pracr in the elimination of the pants may bag at the knees comes from Germany. The Germans tlcally did not move its wings, and After giving the 1922 model bathing placed a thick one in the center, called dangers involved. seemed to glide, except every ten or 'Pfiiis. face may &how signs of a suit the once over, feel more isorry Lebenslicht, the light of life. Enlightened community twelve seconds, When it made a very s^ndrday's growth, "and the Only he or she who decides his or no longer tolerating the dinner /an* slight, and careless sort of rowing nation' her birthday may put out the light of irs if to keep fit. sition of carnivals as a source t-f J? *0-3. i|j| •, ,, Times*haven't changecl much sjncd life it is unlucky If done by any other AUSTIN, MINN. ^"When the bifd abandoned wj, of amWement and the Mqwej^ffipghnuts but don|t you the begirihing. Women are still do-i member of'the family. thought of attacking' its strange rifp -f County Fair Board has, taken him "the old man." He's your iins the ^ork, and men the4»oastm^ The flights are symbols of life and III i' -went1full speed- ahead* and, cover^g a its portions the years. For persons advanced step that is meeting with the father. s. much, more .than. six|y„. miles an hour, endorsemient of right-thinking I For years and*years'he hasf A topers,have gone lot of old in years one^candle must do to soon disappeared.-V duty, as otherwise too many-would be men and women aU over been rustlpgi ^ardund^ to^get reading the tax list.\Xhey say that's) f|gg* Advertisements in the News Bring Results!4 1 required^ county. ithings together.^ NeVer' 6nce a^ there is left with"a- "kick" in it^? ^ew8 advertiai^i|^Bgs .reS'iltaL