sts^rjV. Prr-0HV: -V *rrw*: •-ft'-.^.-ffv* -Wrf-p*'* :•"?''*.*».''• ciK-^iurraris,-^*. -~-^s T$2, jf' "^L"'*', "-v- fts§S®pi_ .,„ 'tmm. INTERNATIONAL FALLSPRESS THE OPIUM HABIT. DEEP .SEA WATER. What Napo'leon Couldn't Do. Caught a Tartar. .. A MODERN SCALPER, "THE PARSON'S CHECKS. An incident connected with Napoleon 8enatofr Theodore E. Burton of Ohio, Its EfFeeta as Described by Bill Nye In when he was in exile In Blba is commemorated Bottles With Which Sampies Are who is a bachelor and has never been The Little Comedy That Was Played His Memoirs. Thsy Were Politely Drawn, btif the on the Island to this day Titoi •'Prom Ocean Depths 'V N ensnared by the wiles of women, tells BitwMn the Acts. Bank Throw Thsm Out. .. I have always: had a horror of opt by an inscription affixed to the wall of The water/ bottle for getting water a story of a young lady and a judge of acts According to j£eorge Cary little comedy between enllvtnrl ates of all kinds. They are so seductive a peasant's house. man named 61a* for analysis* from selected depths in I hi* acquaintance. The former was a Virginians of ante bellum days •bowed things at a Broad way ~t heater one and so still In their operations. They coni was plowing when the famous witness in the latter's court The prosecuting the ocean te a cylinder of brass. German Bight aged great Indifference In money matters. last] week. A middle man •teal through the biood like a wolf on exile came along one day and expressed attorney had repeatedly put to silver or other metal which resists wife sat tMoney in the form of coin waa rarely accompanied by bis directly the trail and they seize on .the heart an interest In his work. Napoleon her questions which she persistently the corrosion of sea. water, generally behind girl and escort. seen. The planters were In the habit a pretty young her with their white fangs tlU It la stm even took the plow handles and levadiedunder the plea that she did not about%two Inches In diameter first At the end of the act the Of writing, checks, on a slip of foolscap, attempted to guide it himself, but the forever. comprehend 'his meaning, whereupon and twelve tor fourteen inches longv middle aged man went out for "fresh instructing the^tfonk to "please" pay. Up the Laramie there la a cluster of oxen refused to obey him, overturned his honor undertook :to bring out the with upward opening valve. at the top air." He came back bringing the smell the amount specified. Bggleston saysr ranches at the base of the 'Medicine the plow and spoiled the furrow. The proper responses. Leaning over, he and bottom, connected together on a of the fresh air and gayer spirits with "This custom of-paying by check «o Bow. hear the north end of Sheep inscription runs thus: •aid in a kindly and fatherly manner: central, stem. Lugs are cast on the him. His wife gave him a startled strongly commended itself to a certain mountain. Well, a young man whom "Napoleon the Great, passing by this "Young woman, why Is it that you •Ide "of the cylinder for conveniently glance, and like a flash her hand went unworldly parson of my time that he we will call Curtis lived at one of place in MDCCCXIV, took in the insist In refusing to understand the securing it. iat any point along the up to his vest. There dangling from resorted to it on one occasion la entire these ranches years ago. and, though neighboring field, a plow from the questions of counsel? You area person length of thfe .line by: which it is to the top button was a'bunch of brown, ignorance and innocence of tbf hands of a peasant and himself dried a quiet, mlnd-your-own-buslness fellow of charm, grace, beauty and more be lowered into the sea. During the curly puffs. There was a dynamitical necessity of haying a bank deposit af than average intelligence and"— to plow, but the oxen, rebellious to who had absolutely ho enemies lowering iof the line, the valves of the second as the wife held the puffs in a preliminary to the drawing of "Thank you, your honor," interrupted those hands which yet had guided Europe, among his companions, he had the bottle are. kept unsealed by the passage, bar whtte gloved hand and looked at checks. He went to Richmond and, headlong fled from the furrow." the young woman, "if It were not misfortune to Incur the wrath of a of the -water through the cylinder them. iNow she. was not a jealous bought a ^year's supplies for his little —St. Louis Republic. for the fact judge, that I am under tramp sheepherder, who waylaid Curtis during its descent, but when the wife—Just a common sense little woman, place—it was too. small to be called a oath 1 would return the compliment" one afternoon and shot him dead motion is reversed the valves seat ready to meet an emergency. plantation—and for each purchase he —National Monthly. themselves and are locked by the descent The Guarantee. |s he sat in his buggy. Curtis wasn't She looked at.the heads about her. drew a particularly polite check. Gobsa Golde, the American millionaire, of a small propeller in the armed. The pjietty- girl's back hair looked as "When the banks threw these out accompanied by his daughter, framework above the upper valve, A rancher came into town and telegraphed Tho "Sting" of Death. If a p&ce? had fallen out. The wife on the ground that their author had no Miss Lotta, picked out a Rembrandt at to .Curtis' father, and then The sting of death physically Is nothing which rides idly on a sleeve during the leanedover to the side away from the account the poor old parson found the a foreign dealer's and then, before half a dozen citizens went out to help man who has loat consciousness' lowering of the bottle, but descends girl's Whispered. girl ejicort and The situation a difficult one to understand. planking down the cash, said very capture the herder, who had fled to In the water, a man who has been* under along a screw thread to press the slipped1 a hand down and batik, and Het had thought that the verypurpose sternly: valves upon their seats when the Hue the foothills.- an anaesthetic, a man stunned In the wife stealthily laid the bunch of of .a bank's being was to cash checks '"Now, see here, sir, do you guarantee commences to be _banl*?d up. A specimen They didn't get back till toward daybreak, an accident—these have been in effect "carried puffs' which her husband had for persons who happened to be short this Rembrandt?" dead, and yet they know nothing of of the water st the depth to which but they brought the herder away on his vest button in the owner's of money. 'Why, If I'd had the money "Yes, Mr. Golde," the dealer replied. death. In speaking of it the most the water bottle hfcs descended is thus with them. I saw him in the gray of tfand. The latter kept them concealed, in the bank,' he explained. 'I shouldn't "A seven years' guarantee goes with brought to the surface confined within glaring contradictions pass quite naturally the morning, lying In a coarse gray reached gently and artfully up,, pinned -have written the checks at all I the canvas." for axioms. It is the "gentl? the bottle, and a series of specimens blanket on the floor- of the engine them escort, Into place, and watching should have got the money and paid "Oh, very well," said Gobsa, mollified, from different depths may be hand," but it is also the "grisly terror." house. He was dead. the rising curtain, was none the wiser. the bills.' and he took out his check book It Is "beautiful" and "wonderful," obtained at one haul by securing a I asked, as a reporter, how he came —New York Times. "Fortunately the matter came to.the and fountain pen.—Washington Star. but It la also "terrible."—London aeries of water battles at the required to his death and they told me. knowledge of a well to do and generous Spectator. Intervals along the sounding line.— "opium." The murderer had taken planter who knew Parson J. and: HIS STUPID MISTAKE. A Bigger Bid. Scientific American. poison when he found that escape was who happened to be In Richmond at A Cargo Hard to Handle. A Lincolnshire parish once possessed Impossible. Asphalt is said to be the most difficult the time. His indorsement made the. a clergyman who was not much appreciated. Muoh to His 8urprise It Was Promptly -The Gentle Gams of Golf. I was present at the Inquest so that cargo for a vessel to unload. The checks good and saved the unworldly One day he remarked to his Reotifisd. On one occasion an old lady was in I could report the case. There was asphalt Is taken out of the asphalt old parson a deal of trouble."—Chicago church warden: "You people don't the same railway compartment as. :a well known Londoner was planning very little testimony, but all the evidence News. lakes in Trinidad in a semifluid state seem to appreciate me. Do you know party of golfers. "I found fearful an entertainment on an elaborate seemed to point to the fact that and by the time the vessel reaches a that on leaving my last sphere of work trouble this morning." said one. '*At scape to be given to various friends life was extinct, and a verdict of death Acquiring a Reputation. northern port has hardened, so that the people showed their appreciation In the neighborhood of his country the first fell right into the middle\pf by his own hand, was rendered^ Archbishop Howley. who lived In the to unload It it Is necessary for the men. so much that they. gave me a real seat. Unfortunately his nearest'neighbor, a prickly gorse bush, and at the second It was the first opium work I had eighteenth century, most unjustly got to go into the hold and dig It out with silver slaver?" a close relative, is highly uncongenlal^to I was stuck up on the top of .a ever seen, and It aroused my curiosity. a the reputation of swearing like pick and shovel. This takes time, and "That Is nothing," was the churchwarden's himself and his intimates, tree. I pitched out of bounds into the Death by opium. It seems, leaves a trooper. The explanation is that the a vessel carrying such cargo alwaya reply. "If tha' would only and hft {racked his brains to devise a farmyard at the third, got caught by dark ring around the neck. I did Puke of Cumberland, who fought the has to arrange for a considerable stay go away from this parish we'd give scheme by which he might avoid the the wire at the fourth. I stuck fast not know this before. People who die battle of Culloden aud who was unspeakably In port. thee a gold un!"—London Chronicle. necessity of inviting the undesirable In a deep hole attbefifth, found myself by opium also tie their hands together profane, once went in quest ceusln iojbe among his guests. burled in mud at the sixth. I was before they die. This Is one of the Hippoeratio Face. of the priuiate to get his assistance MI have It!" he announced to his wife Her Jewels. lying in a heap of rough flints at the about a certain bill which be disliked. eccentricities of opium poisoning that The hippocratic face Is a condition at breakfast on the morning of the Mrs. Subbubs (to neighbor)—Willie seventh, got lost at :the eighth and He returned to the house of lords, saying: I have never seen laid down In the of the human face produced by death, event.: "I'll send him some tickets for and Bobbie aren't home from school finished up at the. bottom of that dirty "It's all right, my lords. I've seen books. 1 bequeath It to medical long illness. excessive hunger and the the play tonight in town. Of course yet, and here it Is 5 o'clock. Did you ditch at the last hole." the archbishop, and he says he'll see science. Whenever* I run up against a like. The nose Is pinched, the temples he*IT delighted, as he, seldom has an see anything of my precious jewels as "Gracious me." cried the horrified the promoters to before he'll vote new scientific discovery I just hand it hollow, the eyes sunken, the ears cold opportunity of going tothe theater." you came along, Mr. Nexdore? Nexdore—Your old lady :from her corner of the carriage, for the bill!" As a matter of fact, right over to the public without cost and retracted, the skin of the forehead The ^tickets were accordingly sent, precious jewels are in "and they told ine that golf was all. the profanity had been supplied Ever since the above Incident I have dry. the complexion livid and the Hps iV ud thehost with an easy conscience soak, madam. I just saw them swimming an old man's game! I'll never let my quite in the ordinary run of conversation been very apprehensive about people relaxed with-cold. This appearance Is proceeded to enjoy the company of his in the river.—Boston Transcript. Edwin play again !'r—London Globe. by the duke.—London Tatler who seem to be likely to form the •o named from having been -accurately frleadi*. But his satisfaction was of opium habit. It Is one of the most described by Hippocrates, the father shortduratlon. At the height of the Ticklish. Now Careless! deadly narcotics, especially In a new of medicine.—New York American. festivities, much to his surprise, in "How many ribs have you?" asked She (sweetly as they sip their tea together)—Isn't Some Pay More. country. walked the objectionable neighbor. the teacher. this delicious? He (absentmindedlyi— Standing over the shattered remains The man was looking over the family "Such a stupid mistake you made!" Yes. I love to take tea "I don't know, ma'am." giggled Sallie. Ethel—My poor head aches frightfully. of their last Dresden china statuette, bills as his wife glanced through the he announced as he approached bis with a little lemon.—Columbia Jester. "I'm so awfully ticklish, 1 could Claire—Why don't you take the exasperated mistress said to the paper. cousin "As soon as I heard about never count 'em.*'—Llpplncott's. your hair off and rest It my dear? awkward servant: "Oh. John." she said, "it tells here Edith—I told Clara, under promise yourparty I knew that you must have Llpplncott's. "Is there anything you haven't of a young fellow who was fined $6.80 •f absolute secrecyof our engagement. •oat me the tickets fotfthe wrong night, broken since you have been with me?" for flirting." Fred—And she has spoken of •o I gdt them changed for tomorrow Set not thyself to attain inu-.'h rest, "Yes. mum." replied the servant "1 "The poorest way to face life Is to "That's cheaper than I got off," replied it everywhere? Edith—No the.spiteful evening and cameright over here as but much patience.—Thomas a Kempis. have yet to break me record for de•tructiveness."—Baltimore face It with a sneer."—Theodore Roosevelt the man, his eye still on the thing never mentioned it. —Illustrated eoon as I could."—London Tatler. American. bills.—Philadelphia Ledger. Bits. OF STOVES MERIT HOME The Merit PILGRIM GARLAND Self Feeding Heater Home Heater is wonderful in construction, made to save coal and give you the necessary heat. Garland Range is beautiful itself, every housewife enjoys a good range and ., &,•) JBfei' f\ she wants the latest. We now have it. No nickle to clean, all plain cast steel.