wm, O •y-f^ijuiii K: iHwim ABOUT EXPEET PENMEN. THE GREATER LOSS, "Couldn't you manage to pay so LITERARY LUNCH FIEND %g& RNCIENT looked ominous, and I turned array IN ITS STYLE. much a month. with a heavy heart. As I reached the The Dahabeeyah on Which. Traveler* garden gate Louise came out of the "Vague improbability, old chap. I A babe lay near the gates of death, His Plan to Secure a Regular Meal Ascend the 3f!lo River. HE IS A SKILLFUL AND PATIENT drawing room and ran after me. She A pure and stainless soul, have mortgaged my next three for Himself Every Day* Naturally there was exhilaration ia ITond parents watched the flattering breath begged met enter, and, as the servant months' screw But—a good idea—I DETECTIVE. the sight of our dahabeeyeh as it lay "That little snob just crossing Their power could not control. did not oppose her, I followed, have a French horn, a regular beauty, A..i£i. \."J 7 ", under the bank at Koobry, opposite noticing that her eyes were red with Twenty-third street," said a prominent worth ten guineas, and dirt cheap at The infant lived. As time went on Kobody ''signs Hi* or Her Name"~ Twic» Cairo, one among forty others—a recent weeping. M. A maiden fair became. that. Now, take it, like a good fellow, club man to the writer, "is one of whole flat-bottom yacht squadron, Exactly Alike—Training in Lithography And learned to love the voice of one "What is the matter, Louise?" I iS?4 and cancel the debt." i." the cleverest bachelors in New York. Who softly breathed her name. suited to the treacherous shallows quired. the Preparation "But -what on earth do I want with He has been a member of my club for which shift from day to day in.the Kile "Your aunt is much worse," she a French horn? It's of no use to for tHe Work. •She listened to his vows untrue, years, and he spends a good deal of bed, says a writer in Scribner's. It replied "she caught a chili through me." «*& Nor dreamed of hidden guile was 100 feet long and looked larger Her simple heart thenceforward knew that foolish freak of yours. I am time there, but I do not feel as though "Then create a use for it. Add to No sunshine save his smile. What is an expert in handwriting? than we had dared to hope, indeed, afraid she will never forgive your your many accomplishments that of I was half acquainted with him. They cruelty to her dog." Popular imagination pictures him, at quite imposing, against tho mud musical amateur. You've a splendid She fled when autumn's blighted leaves say he writes a considerable quantity one moment as a charlatan whose houses, with the tall mainyarcV towering "Hang the brute!" I ejaculated, Mourn o'er the passing years, lip," he continued artfully "just the of matter for the daily and weekly ]j35 feet from heavy butt to* capering And still a grey-haired fathergneve3, angrily. pretensions are founded on error, and cut for the instrument. Now, old Still fall a mother's tears. press. He dresses in good taste, and joint and. though its internal chap, make me eternally grateful by "With all my heart!: but you know carried out by fraud, and, at another how fond she is of it. She has sent economy of space was learned only by accepting. A magnificent bargain lassure evidently has his own tailor, but I (when he happens to be in agreement Last eve amid the hurrying crowd you." for Mr. Raymond." degrees, the eye at once took in the with that abstract qualityj as a supremely (A city's pulse throbs fast). doubt if he has much ready money. I I marked a form whose laughter loud "Yes," I responded, moodily I general lines and ^alized that under I took the instrument,and from that gifted being who is able intuitively never saw him spend a cent at the Had chilled me as I passed. suppose you will benefit by any alteration sail it would be a not unhandsome date my troubles began. to decide whether this or club in my life. He never declines a of her will." craft. In three days I had to find fresh that signature is genuine, or whether I saw—God pity her—a face treat and never offers one. lodgings. I stayed at the next a week. "Don't suspect me of any mercenary Now hardened, once so mild, a certain person really did write a letter There it lay. the counterpart of the In whicli my eyes could faintly trace feelings, Bob," she entreated. 1 tried a boarding house and was presented imputed to him. dahabeeyehs of the pictures, recalling "But this man, who is confidentially The beauty of the child. with three days' board and "It's rather hard to be robbed, of the galleys of old prints- and coins, a Both views are wrong. The penman known among us as the 'Literary both fortune and wife, by that lout of lodging gratis and my boxes bundled And knowing that for her the light degenerate descendant ot Cleopatra's is a skilled, patient, and laborious into the street. Nothing daunted, I a cousin of yours." Lunch Fiend,' lives in clover all the Of heaven might have been, barge, and even a reminiscence of the detective. His first principle is *Twere better she had died that night tried again and hit on my present "You are ungenerous and ungentlemanly," while, and I'll tell you how he does it. barks of Ra and Horus. Oriental familiar to everybody—that the handwriting Thau lived to walk in sin 4 diggings, with a motherly old soul for she rejoined, flushing. His earnings from his pen are perhaps hyberbole has aided this reminiscence is as inseparable a part of the landlady to whom I conveyed my "It is difficult to act the gentleman LILLIAN PLUNKETT, §1,500 a year. A good two-thirds of with the name of dahabeeyeh—boat of man as his nose or his ears. At the orders through the medium of a huge under such circumstances. But I gold—and Egyptian conservatism has speaking-trumpet, and on whom the this he puts into a swell dinner, to same time, it is an important axiom of heartily apologize if I have wounded MY LIST LOVE SEBENABE. kept the general lines of the ships trumpets which blew round Jericho you," his that nobody signs his or her name which he invites about 400 people, would have produced no effect. that bore Pharoah southward against "Then we are friends once more," twice exactly alike, and that one's many of whom are leaders in society. the "vile Kushite." or brought back Up till this xenod the course of my she said, taking my hand. handwriting may vary greatly according Of course, in return all of his guests "Louise," I said, huskily, I read the gold and spices of the land of love had been perfectly smooth, when as one writes with a steel or quill parents both invite him to their houses to dine, and who should turn up but a cousin of by your altered manner that I no Pount to Queen Hatasu. There was pen, in the light or dark, when calm died in my boyhood, longer hold a place in your heart. I thus he is sure of a first-class banquet Louise's, Tom Meldrum. He had the low foredeck, rising only two feet or agitated, and so on. In these leaving me been out to Australia to try his fortune, can't part with you without, a pang, 365 times per annum. above the water at the afterpart, but simple facts, we have the ground-work for if I have not grown to love you, but after a sojourn of five years nothing but their sloping upward to a gayly painted and Being a bachelor, people invite him of his art. Comparison—minute, exhaustive—this in that land of promise, had returned you are at least dear to me. Let us gilded prow, there the sixty feet of more than once during the year to is the means by which bles&ing, and myself remain friends. I am sure I wish you with just sufficient to pay his cab fare their tables, and when his invitations high deck-house, which comprised he puts his principles into practice. as a legacy to from the dock to my aunt's, whei he all happiness." for the same dates conflict he writes the travelers1 portion of the boat and This seems a very easy matter, but a rich and eccentric was loafin» till he found something The poor little thing hung her arms his declinations in such a way as to there were many other things, new in reality it is anything but that. To better to do. around my neck. keep people reminded that though he aunt. She then, familiar now, and remembered begin with, it is almost, if not quite, "You are very good," she sobbed. could not be present on the occasion I was jealous of this Hercules—he having already adopted an orphan with warm affection. indispensable that the expert shall "I could not help it. I tried to think designated he might be able to accept stood six feet one in his stockings. girl, and not wishing to be plagued have been trained as a lithographer, The blue-gowned figures squatting only of you but I couldn't help loving a similar invitation in the near future. Whenever I paid a dutiful visit to the much of whose work, as everybody on the shore rose as we approached with a pair promptly packed Tom. You believe me, don't you?" Oh, yes, he lives on the fat of the land, villa, I was bound to come upon knows, consists of making fac-similes and handed us down the steep bank to "I am sure no one could accuse and he is very popular. Invitations me off to a boarding-school. Here the cousins in some interesting position—poring of letters and circulars by tracing the the freshly painted deck: "This is you of heartiessness. Now, good-by to his annual feast are much coveted, over sketch-books or I remained, holidays included, till I original writing through a thin sheet our crew," said the 'big Howaga," as just one kiss, for the last." and his presence at the dinners given albums. Aunt was confined to her attained my eighteenth year. Not till of prepared paper on to a stone from he was called by the sailors. We essayed A fortnight later Aunt Matilda died. by those constituting this set of bed, and could not watch over my then did Aunt Matilda condescend to I attended the funeral, and listened to which the circulars that find their way our two words or so of Arabic worthies is deemed especially essential. interests, and so my rival had the the reading of the will. It left me suffk He is an inveterate flatterer of to our letter boxes are printed. It is salutation hundreds of white teeth field to himself. receive me, cient to buy a mourning ring. Everything beautiful women and gifted men, who obvious that a man so employed could flashed a smiling reply, and the presence I determined to warm up my fickle went to Louise. She did not greet me with much swallow his oily cajoleries as from a not fail to note every mannerism in a of these good-natured, picturesquely love's waning affections, and with this chalice containing the nectar of the I returned home, and taking the hand, and that, if kept constantly at robed athletes added another warmth. She kissed me, and then object I practiced assiduously on French horn from its case I "jumped on gods. There is probably not another work, he would very soon draw up in charm to our prospective journey. the French horn a lovely German rewarded a fat poodle which nestled it till it was past recognition. I then man in the metropolis who, like him, serenade I had purchased at a cheap his own mind a philosophy of handwriting. in her lap with the same attention. pitched it into the lumber attic. And could be, year in and year out, a successful ]8? i, Particulars Not Requested. music stall. this is the end ot my bright visions of literary lunch fiend."—New ''You have grown very much like I taxed my patience to the uttermost, He (despairingly). "It doesn't matter Having had this training, then, the the future. I shall end my days in a York Herald. your fool of a father." and most people's within a respectable if I have got lots of money—I cannot penman knows where to look for the workhouse in all probability, or some radius of sound. If I endeavored forget that my grandfather was a "Pardon me, aunt," said I, astounded peculiarities of a handwriting—1 he equally disagreeable and disreputa- to make a crescendo on a stage driver." at this introductory remark joinings, the slope, the formation of IN MEMORY OF SLAVES. certain note, I invariably cracked it, bhe (sweetly). "That is all right certain letters, etc. By the aid of a Rat-tat! *'you mentioned—" or split it into two or three. You can refer to your ancestral hauls powerful magnifying glass he carefully The postman. Another bill, I suppose, "Your father, blockhead!" shesnapped. But by laudable perseverance I got Plans Suggested by a Baptist without going into particulars."— scrutinizes one document, whatever to keep its disconsolate brethren over these little difficulties as far as the Clergyman in Richmond. "Whatever my poor sister saw in Sparks. it m^y be, until he is familiar company. serenade was concerned, and determined Several weeks ago Rev. Dr. Landrum, feuch a match passes my comprehension. with its Characteristics. Then he "Two letters for you," breaks in on the first fine moonlight night Very Sadden. while delivering a sermon at the Nothing but a ne'er-do-well, the maid handing me an importantlooking looks for corresponding characteristics to give it a practical trial and see what "Well. Harris, did you call on blue envelope and a smaller Second Baptist Church upon missions, in the other document or documents romantic effect would do in the good-for-nothing—" Maud's father?" I did." "How did, white one. and follows up a clue until he cause of Cupid. stated that he thought it would be "Excuseme, aunt," I remonstrated, you come out?" "I've been trying to I tore open the former impatiently- runs it to earth. In due course he exceedingly fitting to erect a monument At length the auspicious night "but hadn't we better change the subject? remember. It was all so sudden, I proceeds to draw up his report, which arrived and I set out for Hampstead, in Richmond to the memory of don't know whether it was by the window The weather is very sultry." is often a veritable curiosity. Upon "What's this? arriving there quite two hours beiore or the elevator shaft"—Harper's the colored slaves who so faithfully We beg to inform you thai the sum of She laughed outright. this point Charles Reade's powerful the time I had arranged for the performance—midnight. £10,000 has been placed to your credit by Bazar. served their masters during the war. story, "Foul Play." may be consulted So I adjourned *'I am pleased to find you are not Miss Louise Hawthorne. Awaiting your with advantage, for it contains a report to the shelter of the nearest public, Dr. Landrum said that he had not as the same easy-going fool he was. I instructions, we are, sir, vonrsobe'dientlv, BUSINESS WIT LUXURY and fortified myself with several stiff made for the author by a wellknown Clinton & Co." yet formulated frs plans for the suppose you are right. We will let the The most happy women within their tumblers of whiskeyjand-water till living expert. When great issues I opened the smaller envelope. It jioor man rest," which remark was scheme. He added that he hopes the homes are those who have married sensible closing time. This I know would be contained but a few words, but how are at stake, however, the document very charitable, considering poor dad men. monument will not be one of marble bad for articulation on the French tender and welcome is of a much more formidable nature According to recent statistics there are 'had been at rest for eight years. Dear Bob, I could not rest in the enjoyment accent, but I needed bracing. 01 bronze, but of brick. .His idea is than that given in the novel. 5,500,000 women in Germany who earn of the entire iortune your aunt left ''Come," she continued, "I want to Unfortunately for me, though I was that the memorial should be an The expert draws up on sheets of me. .She always intended Ave both should their own living, a greater number than introduce you to Louise, your future unaware of the fact, Aunt Matilda enjoy it, and in dividing it with ycu I ieel tracing paper, fastened to a white surface, is to be found in any other nation. eleemosynary institution. He favors had an unconquerable prejudice I am only carrying out her true wishe=. wife." two columns of corresponding The orange crop of California has become an old folks' home. Applicants must Toin and I are to be married as soon as against music in any shape or form. so large that it can not be marketed I stood open-mouthed with amazement. peculiarities—one from the false circumstances will permit. I am sure you show that they have been slaves and German bands visiting the locality, at paying prices. Thousands of acres of writing, the other from the real writing wish us happiness. I do this with his as I afterward learned, were always were of good report with their masteis, the land of California are now bearing "Don't stand staring there, you knowledge and sanction. Ever yours in of the person suspected—and to sure of a rich harvest—to take themselves young lemon trees The olive and fig bcobyl" iriendship. LOUISE. and are now in ind igent circumstances each entry he attaches a reference in off and Italian piano and crops of the state are now profitable. —From Spare Moments. "My wife'" I gasped. red ink showing whence it was taken. and aged. Experiments in the raising of Ceylon tea organ grinders from the purlieus of "Yes. I suppose you may as well Experts have much work that nobody in southern California will soon be tried Saffron Hill and Seven Dials were At some time in the near future, if Musical Signalling. know lirst as last. I shall leave you sees or hears of save themselves Some of the Indians of the South and amazed at the openhanded generosity the movement continues to increase in my fortune—twenty thousand pounds It is a theory which seems to have Southwest were excellent agriculturists which preceeded a threat of the police and their employers, says the Saturday favor, he will call a public meeting of in consols—but only on condition you In Georgia and Alabama, when the white been confirmed by practical experiment if they came again within 500 hundred Evening Post. Of matrimonial squabbles marry Louise, you understand?" ex-slaveholders to consider the propriety men first went among the Natchez Indians yards of the place. that apure tone of voice, such as there is no end and penmen are "Yes, aunt," I responded feebly. of organizing. It is expected they found them all cultivating mdSSSm constantly being called upon to banish But, blissfully unconscious of this, that used in singing, penetrates to a "Following her I was introduced to maize, beans, sunflowers, sweet potatoes, that the contributions will come not or confirm suspicions. Then wills and also that she was nearly at death's melons, pumpkins, and a large number of Loui&e, and at once fell in with my much greater distance than mere noise. only from Richmond people, but from door with her old enemy, rheumatism, are documents, the authenticity of the native Iruits growing in orchards— •aunt's proposals. She was lovely. I This idea has given rise to a new system all the South. I wended my way to the villa. which, in about fifty cases out of every persimmons, honey-locusts, mulberry, don't think it would have needed my As a means of aiding the work Dr. of marine signalling, to used black walnuts and shell barks of the best Arrived there, I stationed myself hundred, somebody or other is pretty -aunt's for tune as an incentive to falling Landrum would be glad to receive kind were sorted and planted by them. either at night or foggy weather, under the window of Louise's bedroom, sure to impugn. -at once in loT. with her. Dark, with from any ex-slaveholder or others incidents extracted my instrument of At the' foot of Adrass Hill, by the side Again a romantic young lady of a splendid hazel eyes, laughing mouth, and based entirely upon the action of proving the fidelity of the of the Clane road, near the town of Colbridge, tortue from its green baize cover, and .and pure transparent skin, she was calculating nature—and it is odd, bythe-bye, successive musical tones. negroes during the war. He wishes to Kildaro, Ireland, is "St. Patrick's placed it to my lips. indeed a picture of youth and beauty. how often the two qualities, use these narratives to increase tha A limited number of combinations Well." "This blessed well," says a recent She received me graciously, and I Just then I felt something sniffing so opposed in themselves, are found interest in this philanthropic work. visitor, "is circular, built round with masonry, of notes can be made to carry on all could see that my aunt was pleased about my legs, and looking down, beheld together, is anxious to know whether and partially covered with a large Dr. Landrum believes the capital with the impression she had made. A my aunt's tat poodle. It had been the conversation neccessary between Alphonse really did send her a certain flagstone Soni9 ancient ivy-clad thorn of the late southern Confederacy is few days after Aunt Matilda broached locked out by accident by the servants. valentine, in which "love" rhymes to trees overshadow it, and, to judge by the approaching vessels to avoid collision, the place for the location of the my future. I conciliated the brute by pats and numerous pieces of rags tied to the bushes -dove," as of yore, or whether, after colored old folks' home. He is enthusiastic or between light-houses and danger&us "I don't want to see you about the caresses, and it lay down contentedly and briers around it, it is still held in high and believes the good work all, it came from young Jenkins, the points ot the coast, in order to prevent veneration in the district." house idly wasting your time," she on the grass at my feet. will go on.—Richmond Dispatch. lawyer's clerk, who has no expectations said. You must adopt some profession. I had started the serenade. It went wrecks. Whips may be very expensive One beyond those common to the Now, to what do you incline?" beautifully. I didn't think the instrument Four notes, for example, serve to presented to William H. Vanderbilt cost entire human race. Somebody, too, $2,000. W. K. Vanderbilt has one that ask, "Which way are you heading?" "I think the army would suit me," was capable of such pathos. I THE COST OF ROYALTY. takes offence at one of those monstrous cost $350. Pierre Lornlard has one, with and two others mean, "I am steering I suggested. had got half-way through it when the colored productions (known to the a carved ivory handle, that cost §500. southeast." "Oh, yes," she retorted, sarcastically. window of the bed-room was opened, little boys, we believe, as "longuns") The Great Editor Speaks Cynically Whips that cost $23 and $100 are favorite "A future field-marshal in embryo' and I dimly saw a white figure halfhidden The system can-be employed on a of Royal Pensioners, and wishes to know the name of the articles for presentation and America* No, no you must learn some* by the ivy which embowered it. large scale by means of machinery consisting leads the wprld in making them. One of sender, not 'for publicity, but as a of a keyboard, on which the The cost of British royalty is about thing useful, not the art of cutting This gave me fresh courage. Louisa the costliest whips was made in Connecticut guarantee of good faith So it happens yom- fellow-men to pieces. What do was looking at me. 1 poured my operator would play, and "speaking $5,000,000 a year. In addition to for a Frenchman. The stock was that every February sees a little apparatus." It is expected that by you say to a doctor?" young soul through the silver-tipped carved ivory, gold and jewels. The whip the maintenance of palaces and the heap of such literature lying on thq such apparatus communication may "That's only another way of cutting mouth-piece. I had got to the last was of whalebone covered with braided building of royal yachts the incomes desk of the expert. Of all such work be established at a distance of two my fellow-men to pieces. I don't note when a mournful and discordant threads Of whalebone. The American voted to the family are enormous. —or, at least, the greater portion of miles. The invention can be adapted think I should make a ood doctor." howl came as an accompaniment. I whip is a straight whip, while English, to the Morse code of signals when it it, the outside public know nothing. French and German whips are lash whips. "You haven't the necessary gumption raised my foot, and sent the poodle The Prince of Wales has over $500,000 becomes necessary to spell out names to make a good lawyer. I think spinning five yards away. and the Princess $50,000 a year. or words. the best thing you can do is to enter "You wretch!" The younger sons of the Queen have the civil service." Horror! I had mistaken the window. been voted $125,000, the daughters Protest was useless, and my aunt Brotherly Criticism. had her own way. So shortly after Aunt Matilda stood there, in wrathful $30,000 each, the Duke of Cambridge, It is unwise, as a general thing, to I passed my examination and became indignation. Hot Griddle Cakes. the Queen's cousin, $60,000, and his ask other people what they think of a, member of her Majesty's civil service. Here was a pretty predicament. I two sisters $25,000 and $15,000 respectively, our work. The result may be unpleasant I had my own quarters, which a had nearly killed her pet, which lay alternately and $500,000 was voted decent allowance from my aunt enabled whining and howling under both for them and for us. to the Empress Frederick of Germany me to keep up, and I occasionally some holly bushes. Two ministers were discussing the visited her at the snug little Hamp«tead "Poor Flossie! Don't dare to show when she was married. Dr. Price's Cream Baking Powder possesses a peculiar process of sermon-writing. village. your face within these walls again! The lord chamberlain, lofd steward, "Now with me," said one of them, merit not approached by that of any other baking powder. Thus I imagined myself handsomely My darling pet' I knew th^re was no and master of buckhounds get $28,500 "the only really hard things to manage provided tor with a fortune, and ah good in such a srock! My precious It produces the hot buckwheat, Indian or wheat cakes, hot per year each, seven lords in waiting -amiable bride in prospective. On the treasure! After beini? a second mother are the introduction and the conclusion. get $3,500 each for a few weeks strength of the former I obtained to you!" and the window went biscuit, doughnuts, waffles or muffins. Any of these tasteful You remember the sermon I each year "in attendance." The ladies plenty of credit, stayed out late with down with a bang, while, from my uncomfortable preached at the installation of Brother of the bed-chamber have $2,500 things may be eaten when hot with impunity by persons of jovial companions," and should no position, I could hear a So-and-So not long ago? Well, I flattered a year each. doubt haye gone to the dogs had I bell violently ringing. Utterly crestfallen, the most delicate digestive organs. Dr. Price's Cream Baking myself that the exordium and not been hauled up short by the events I repacked the now hateful What would be thought in the United Powder leavens without firmentation or decomposition. am about to relate. Out of my cause of my trouble. As I passed the the peroration of that sermon were States, of the Senate, were each incoming iirst quarter's allowance from Aunt corner of the house I heard a suppressed President able to distribute pretty well done. Do you remember In its,preparation none but the purest of cream of tartar, soda, Matilda I lent a fellow-clerk, Jack tittering, and a window was salaries to some thirty Senators for what you thought of them?" Denton, £5, for which he promised hurriedly closed. etc. is used, and in such exact equivalents as to always performing ceremonial duties about "Yes," said, the other minister, I •handsome interest. I waited patiently "Fair "and false,' I bitterly thought, his person or about that of his wife? remember thinking they were very guarantee a perfectly neutral result, thereby giving the natuxa' but in vain for its return At the as I recognized the dark locks of my Would the Senate be deemed independent good, but too far apart." -end of two years—although by that inamorita. of the Executive were it possible and sweet flavor peculiar to buckwheat and other flour tune I regarded it as a bad debt—I Slowly and sorrowfully I retraced to give a Senator from the North The hair of the hog being thin, the ventured to remark that I should like my steps homeward, and with a dull lhat may be used, the natural flavor so much desired and ap many thousand dollars per annum for animal is more sensitive to cold than TO see the principal,and would willingly foreboding of the consequences to follow. walking backward before the President preciated by all. The oldest patrons of Dr. Prices powder tell any other, and ought to be well waive all claim to the interest. with a white stick, a Senator housed and protected from extremes Nor was I wrong. I lost half a day "My dear fellow," was his reply, I the story, that they can never get the same results from any from the South a huge income for of temperature. They should not with the intention of apologizing to would pay you with all the pleasure looking after the Presidential dogs, .other leavening agent, that their griddle cakes, biscuits, etc. have a warm nest out of which they in the world, but, unfortunately, am my aunt, but was refused admittance. and the wife of a Senator from the are called into the snow or rain or completely stumped." While I stood at the door, uncertain West a big salary for presiding over are never so light and never taste so sweet or so good as how to act, Mr. Raymond, my aunt's very cold air to be fed, as this surely I saw no chance of its recovery, but the gowns and petticoats of Mrs. 1 when raised with Dr. Prices Cream Baking Powder. det 4 'mined to press him, a .little. o^se disease. President?—Labouchere in Truth. eM mmmM yk^iSk