7 f^tiYmautv/fyjg NEW ULM"*REVmW, WEDNESDAY, MARCH 7, 1883. LUOJOHtf TWO WAYS. %M Plantation Philosophy. Eating on Wagers. De chile what yer takes de mos' care It was a regular northeaster and The papers, dispatches, etc., have ob is de one what is de mos' apt ter git snowing fast "Fine snow storm, been full of accounts of the progress hurt. A man always mashes his sore driver, said a fat man as he deftly THE BEST made by a man named Walton, in New finger. swung himself to the front platform of AOKBTS! For Gen. Dodge'snew book, York, at eating two quails a day for S..V It is a ole sayin' dat one bird in de a slowly-moving Third avenue horse thirty days, on a wager. Crowds have *r OF ALL ban' is wuth two in de bush. It may be car, pulled up his ulster collar, pulled visited the place where he was doing OUR WILD INDIANS LINIMENT! wuth more ter de man, but it ain't wuth down hist sealskin cap and faced the the eating, and the people of America half as much ter de bird. storm with tho enjoyment known only have been entertained with descriptions IntroductianbyGen W. T. Sherman. Contains* In youth we has appetite, an' in ole to fat men well clad. The driver was of the rapid manner in which the human truthful and graphic record of the autnor'a'bbaenra* age de rheumatiz, arr in a mighty heap tired and cold and cross. glutton tore to pieces the quail and turns, thrilling- adventures and exciting experience* during yean among the wildest Inbcs of the ob instances de indulgence ob one is de "Fine snow storm," repeated the fat deposited the meat in his capacious stomach, Great West. Splendidly illustrated with Steel FOB KMT AND BEAST. cause ob de udder, i knows, kase if I man cheerfully. "Regular old-fashioned and the bones beside his plate. Plates, Fine Engravings and Superb Chrotno-Lith* For COUGHS, COLDS, SORE THROAT, BRONCHITIS, ASTHMA. PNEU hadn'ter got drunk an' laid out in de Ograph Plates in fifteen colors. Has received the snow storm. Makes one think of The man Walton accomplished the feat IVSONSA, CONSUMPTION, Diseases ofs THROATn CHEST thANDtLUNGS.vfmpo^mcte unqualified endorsement of the mosteminent men of For more than a third of a century tho I woods, dese ole jints wouldn'ter been old times." always bee one of and won the bet, and he is looked upon our country. Gen. Grant writes: "The best book IM* xican Mustang Liniment has been i Ha ^Hi f% fkBi a^a TAl I nigh so stiff. "You may call it fine. I call it allfired on Indian and Frontier life ever written." Bishop as a hero, and pointed at as the man I Known to millions nil over tho world as I 'itll Kffl Ilia I I If I I I weapons wielded bv the MEDIC KL FACTHROAIIl VcV BKONCHITIS, ASTHMA, SOE E Wiley, of Cincinnati, says: "A much needed book reliancmefoexternal pain of|i I the only sale the relief Dar ain't no way dat yer ken make a onpleasant," said the driver.yankmg who ate the sixty quails, and it is not Iift4e OrlllR II I III advance1*a?amsttheall 1 encroachments tooiTHROAT.CHESsrepud incipient and stages, ane diseases of the S andoneof immense value." Chicago Imtertorf "A pain.c laicidents and It is a medioinef a diffam stimulant and th 8, A\v, rxfiM/O 'oman madder den by goin' inter de affor at the reinsas the near horse slipped improbable that he will be nominated book of standard and substantial value." Chicago i' icroc ver :rties I ..bove pi una praisethe beet of if ,',lnD ?Sadvantageously compounded as in the TOLU, KOCK and ."iAi'Mr?SS cpro everbeen Advance: "No other book contains as full and \\^"i m, house an' turnin' ober de churn. I once on the snowy cobble-stones "Fine nuthinr fu 1 I h?** for President in 1884. A similar case i0u ?t 1h r- f^\f tgB, hain' got accurate accountof theIndians." Chicago Tribune Proprietary Stamp on each bottle, which f, an1 i:^ knowed a mighty ligious cullud 'oman 5 MEXICAN them as likes it, iV has created a good deal of interest in "It reads like a romance, and is far superior to any QuartD enjoy it S'pose y' ask them s\ stem aftei tae cough has been relieved size bottles, Price Si oa butt1 book ever published on the subject" The Cktcajtm dat wanted ter pray all de time. One t' do O, Milwaukee, and in case Walton is nominated nvat a? a Inttr Octau It vividly portrays the Indianjutt i M1* 8 (fife E Do not be deceived by dealers who try to palm off Eoek and Bye day a preacher came along 'anshe axed bosses their o-pinion uv yerfine,stormt. for President we want to see a^2^Ss it don' M, WM,! lyWi place of our TOL V, BOCK ANlJ KtfK,TbicbTia mSoKC* h?2XWi enjoyin1 him ter pray for her. De ole man, They seem be BROWN'S IBON BITTERS are the Milwaukee party occupy the second S S 1 999 AGrJSNTS this graad*book 5*12 by lirug feeble in years, got down on his knees, the\?" Grocers and Dealers Everywhere, Mustang Liniment is without an equal a certain cure for all diseases place on the ticket Among the hogs waiting thousands! It is the opportunity of a lift* It penetrates flesh aud musiie to I *m 43- WITHOUT SPECIAL TAX O LICENSE. but in de skuflie necessary terfixin' hissef, "It is haul on the animals, that's a requiring a complete tonic especiallyIndigestion,Dyspepsia, at the stock yards in this cityisone who time for rapid money making] Remember, new the -eijr honemaking the continuance V..o I 'case de suppleness ob de boy wan't LU, ROCK AMD BYE CO., Proprietors, 41 River St., Chicago, lit book, superbly illustrated immense demand exchw fact," said the fat man, his cheerful Intermittent never seemed to get enough to eat. He of pain, and inflammation iinpos sive territory and Special Terms. Send for illaa* sible. Its ffects upon Ilrman Flesh a' in him, he turned de churn ober, an' de tace lengthening a trifle as he watched Fevers, Want of Appetite, would eat all there was in sight, and trated circulars, with full particulars, to the Bnite Cr ntion are equally wonilei 'oman forgot her 'ligion an' broke de Iioes of Strength, Ltack of Energy, the steaming horses strain at the load. drive the other hogs away from the ful. Ih Mciican A. NKTTLaTOM CO., OMoago, lis MUSTANG dasher ober his head. etc ISnricbes the blood, strengthens "I was thinking of the country. Such trough, and if a man threw an ear of BUTTER COLOR ^^E^TED tho muscles, and gives new a snow stoim in the country is a fine corn at this pointer hog he would catch 9 lire to the nerves. Acts like r thing, now, nn'to ithaj it and eat it though it Knocked out his Yo ain't seed," said the S C-LTR E FOR charm on the digestive organs, 4 teeth. About the time it was announced ttGtTeaBntterthee-Ut-edmdeolor the year roaad. The Unrest Butter Bayers recommend its ns* MU WMEIE All Hit MILS. Liniment is needed by somebody 1 11 Why the Parisians Laugh. removing all dyspeptic symptoms Thousands of Dairy^a say ITIS PERFECT. Used by allthe best Creameries. Awarded the IntCb driver, looking at the fat man, that Walton was going to eat BestCoachtsjnrnp. Tastesgood. nationalDiploma at TT T. Dairy Fair. ft^lCTonrdrafeistormerchsntforlttorwiltctoaaki every house. Evmy day brings news whatit is. "What is the boundary"which separates who-uses!t-, such as tasting the food, Belching UseIntimenteKbydrogglslB, WELLS.a MCHAJSOl-f i It costs, where to Ret It. A Q^i. PtwerteeetVBi "But I useoto be Happiest time of a match at quail, a stock drover offered the agony of an awful scald or bur tear9 a smile from a Heat in the Stomach, Heartburn subdued, of rheumatic martyrs 1 my life and the cheerful face beamed to bet he had a Long Island pointer hog *^US fONLY)fTH!S3fTHE ^FIRST^ANQ stored, or a valuable horse or ox "Give it up -tc The only Iron Preparation again. that could eat a bushel of corn a day for saved by tho healing powci of this that will not blacken the teeth or "The nose." LINIMENT RFTHS'PEMREESEEOS "How we boj did enjoy such a storm. thirty consecutive days, and a sporting give headache. Sold by all Druggists RESTIdare I can see it all now. The gray clouds man took him up. The contest was appointed The scene is laid at a Spiritualist assembly, at $1.00 a bottle. hanging low all day, and then after not, life Is weeping by, go and to take place at a hog-pen, adjoining and the medium has evoked a before jou die, something noon the big flakes beginning to oome a road house, and the nog commenced BROWN CHEMICAIi CO.* departed spirit of the mighty dead. mighty and sublime leave behind which speedily cores sauh ailments *t slowly down We could see them on his first bushelof corn on the to conquer time. $68 a week in The following conversation then takes Baltimoie, Md. the HUMAN FLESH as jour own town $5 outfit free through the schoolhouse windows, and 1st of January, in the presence of a "U.' that all Iron Bitters e madefcvBP N JI SEEDS For the MERCHANTS!!^**?!?" place amidst an excited hush: SEEDS RUeumatftaae, Swellings, UtlfT No risk. Everything new, Capital Co aa I lifve er*8efl red lines ni 1 rs Li ir i ri -f how uneasy the sight made us feel." number of other hogs and several men Joints, 1 ontraeted Hnseles, Burn* For the MARKET "Is the spirit of Epaminondas pres- not required. W will furnish you everything CARFENCR BEWAviE OF S"i TA7 and Scalds, Cmts, Jsrulsosi and Not half s'uneasy as yer school mom Many are making fortunes. Ladies make aa much who were interested in the bet The SEEa/^Growthe ff\Hr-or PRIVATE FAMILY ent?" Sprains, Polsemous Bites and as men, and boys and girls make great pay Reader, made ye feel, I'll bet" champion got away with his first bushel by ourselvessDjaoLasalasBii stings. StUttaeas, I*aa.eness, Old (Three affirmative knocks.) if you want a business at which yon can Sores, TJleers, Frostbites, Chilblain*. "And then when school was out," of corn in forty minutes and grunted make great pay all the time, write for particulars "And do you recognize me, bright Raral Resistor WUEE TO AIX. **or Nipples, Caked Breast, and *~7~ nandaotne Illustrated Catalogs* aae to H. HAIXBT & Co., Portland, Maine. nov. S9 continued the fat man, not heeding the for more, and was going to chew off a PIKER'S HAIR BALSAM visitant from abetter clime?" indeed every form of external disease. irXCIl VNTS, SEND US YOUR BUUNES8) CARDS FOR TRADE LIST. interruption, "how we dashed through piece of the trough, but he was driven I heals wlthont aeare. (Three affirmative knocks.) TheBest, Cleanest and A For the Baun CBJunoM It cures the storm on our wayhome, with shouts away with a club. His trainer gave him most Economical Hair "Who am YJ &3ETH&S0NS,SEED G30WERS,PHiLADELPci!A Sprains, SJirtnur, Stiff Joints, Dressing of happy merriment, tossing the flufty a bottle of pepsin, and he laid down Founder, Harness Sores, Hoof Bis* "An infernal ass!" spelled out the Meyer Falls to Restore whiteness into the air, throwing ourselves eases, Foot Bot, Screw Womt and took a nap, and next morning he Seab spirit of Epaminondas. i HENS LAV Hollow Horn, Scratches, Windgalls. aa ban. r a^iy iur|Ma aa4 Chaatlst. full length into the fleecy, downy was hungry for more. The hog ate the jhe youthful colort grey lov 30 83 Spavin, Thrash, Blnabone. travalieg ia this caaatrr 7 that Boat af tat *r. 50c and $1 suesat drifts, getting" second bushel in even a shorter time Uorst aud Caul* low =r oi4 here are worth Old Sores, Poll Evil, Film upon "That is a fine dog you have, my face all-fired well washed lata trash, tut say. thai Baendan's Coadiuao the Sight and every other ailment "Gettin1 than the first, and kept it up for about friend," says a charitable passer who has Powder* art abieiateiy sre aed immensely lUresUi Ciltpe. PENSIONSa,Sf to whleh the oecnpante or the valuable N tini by the big boys, an' bellerin' like a twenty days, and seemed to be having just dropped a coin into the hat of a powder* art abieiateiy ssre aaa immensely table and Stock Yard are liable. to 1 pint food Sold Aaewaadescatdisfly fatmat on earth will make hens lay like Sheridan'* Onndltioa Hoarders. Deee. 1 teespeenrel sick 3teer when ye got plugged in the a pic-nic. It was a soft thing for the The Hewlccn Mnstang Kilnla*ant poor blind man. M4 iMttac Varna*. everywhere or seat by mall ter 8 Wttar-atampe. a. JcoyaoM A Co.. Beswee MASS always ewes aad sere* dlaappolats PriceWaad It*. ear 'ith a snow-ball ^th a stun into it" hog. He was the observed of all observers. "It is indeed, sir." PARKER'S and it la, positively, I |J. rwm "And then what pleasant excitement Other hogs did not attract passing THE BEST "What will you take for him I should iacforcedaablad Promptworkaadhoyes1M*VfX- uttfaduriic- SjrVaaalaU* met* Ftower SeeS Catslapse sW and unusual hurrying there was on the notice, but everybody around the like to buy him?" 1 lSISwuTaeaaBtFBSBaallwheaS|il CaatiMBcnof "cSSdeStt GINGERTONIC 1 allduauxterntwUs A TCiiT'ft lest aaaaoa aacd aet wtiu for it All atad aast horn ay farm. Itgrewdaik early. The cows stock-yards pointed to the pointer, as he and.BackPayad Disduugesfncuma. tD*tmJgVJ" "Sell my dog?" exclaims the blind tors L**4 Warrants IK I MUMItaiaaat ataraaMad tobebothfcaahaadttueto niiaa. were driven into the warm stables and lay under the shed, grunting with a belly so tar, that should it prove otherwise, agree torefillthe or ALL man "Never, sir, never! Why, sir, I order grabs coUcctloD of vegetable seed is one of stood contentedly in their stanchions, full of corn, and said, "That is the prize that dog as I do the apple of my LINIMENTS! the most extensive to be bund in any American catalogue, 1 DIBU CX UUUUIJ WUIC aeja WW* I I *Ws&lMB>a GO and targe part of it of my own growing Aa the calmly chewing their cuds, and" champion hog. He is a daisy." The eye'" original tatredaeer of Early Ohio and BarbaJtk *en*ioo. Patent & L*n Atfys. Washington. D 0 A Pun family Mdidm that Ntvcr Intoxicates. Potatoea. Marblehead Early Com. the Habfcar4 hog got so he would not grunt at other "An' when ye went to milk 'em by Jan, 15 8S. Sqaaah, Marbleheod Cabbic I'htnney'a Melaa, At the French ball. If you are a mechanic orfanner, worn out with hogs, and he seemed to put on shape at the light uv a taller candle stuck into and a score of other new Vegetables I invite the patron 3 overwork or a mother run down by familyorhousehold of the public In the gardens and on the farms of "What, are ou here, Gaston, when once. People would visit the stock an ole tin lantern punched full o' holes, John (fl* tuUt ti'i 1-.1.U. lose who plant my seed will he found m\ best advertise duties try PARKBR'S GINOKR TONIC. ment James H. Gregory, Mvblefcead Mass only two weeks ago you buried the wife The leading beats'Fur nishi ng Hon yards and they had only eyes for this the one-eyed bnnule jestnatcherly kicked FOB MAN OB BEAST. If you area lawyer, minister or business man exhausted who loved you so fondly and to whom nog, and they would punch him in the the pint an' a half o' strippins in yer by mental strain or anxious cares do not of the Northwest lake intoxicating stimulants, but use PARKER'S you seemed so devoted?" ribs and pull his bristles out for keepsakes pail galley west" 1S5 EAST TBIBD ST PAUL GINGER IONIC. "Well, and where would you wish to wear in lockets. Other hogs i The fat man did not seem to heed the DIAMOND (old stand) Bmttn* JYJtAers. i If you have Dyspepsia, Rheumatism, Kidney or me to be!" would be standing around the troughs interruptions. Perhaps they supplemented Urinary Complaints, or ifyou are troubled with any Men's Furnishers and Shirt makers. making good reeords on swill, but nobody "It does seem to me that if I had lost his own happythoughts so completely disorderofthelungs stomach bowels,bloodornerves CATARRH THE you can be cured by PARKER'S GINGER 1 ONIC paid any attention to them. On the companion of my life I should be that he thought they were his If\ ou are wasting awayfromage, dissipation or the twenty-first day the hog lost his appetite somewhere else, weep" own thoughts. REMEDY, anydiseaseor weakness and require a stimulant take for corn and he yearned for swill, "Over her grave* I know, but the "Yes," he said, looking over the GINGER TONIC at once itwill invigorate and build I joii up from t\e first dose but v/111 never intoxicate but he had to eat the corn or nothing. cemetery closes at sundown!" horses' ears into the past "Yes. The OF EVEBY KIND CHEA?rS THAR EVEK It his saved hundreds of lives it may save yours A Poaitlre Cure for Catarrh of all tUHes, Shot Guns, Revolveis, Aiumunitiou, He looked sick, and bets of twotoone barn is redolent with the smell of hay kinds. It tm Instantaneous in fefiVct Fishing Tackle, Sunea, Nets, I IHsr-OX & CO 363 V, llllam St, Nir York S0 were made that he would fail, but the and the sweet breath of the cattle. The Not Boarders. and Parma aent In tftenlt Cnrea at any -K lUrfelzeiat all ilealirs in medUfncs Kui\ea, Kazors, Skatoa, is now made foi* Hi foui'i rear and sta^e of the disease. Hat curad cases so terrible backer, who knew his hog, took all the horses stand in their stalls munching Harumocka, etc. I?EAT si rva BUYING COLLAR SIZF "And so you are working right across that bone* oarae from the aose We continue to bets, and his protege finally worried has a reeoul uuqu nhxnl fc.ucee'-s. their oats" Ljifge Illustrated Catalogue FREE. the street from me?" queried the first, actaBSolicitorufor Dr. Evors's Diamond Catarr Remedy down the corn, but he drove someother GREAT WESTERN GUN WORKS "Which the same they is tailins what It was the first i and has been as they met on 47th street the other afternoon. patents, caveats, la mild and pleasant afl rdlnj? immtJIat* Relief and prompt cure in all casaeot at&rrh, hogs away from an adjacent trough of yer old man couldn't sell, they bein' l. trade-marks, oopyrighta. etc. for brought to pertectio.i vhPc competing PITTSBURGH, JPA. InAneusa* Hay FeTer. Bronchitis. MRS. LYDiA rlHKHAM, OF LYNN, MASS., maelui.e5' haveb* en swul and ate it for dessert. Each day lightweight." the United States, and to obtain patents "Yes" It will lemove Polyp and effectually euro and imitating in Canada. England, France, after that the hog walked up to his "In the yard the children shout in Watery and Puiulant Discharges f.ora the Bead "And its a boarding house?" made for only one or tvo soaon-i Germany, and all other countries.o and Throat, and Foetid. Sickening Breath per bushel of core asthough itwas his grave their innocent glee as the snow comes practice N "Oh, no we are a strictly private 1 Thirty-six years fectl/ lestore impaired bmell, Taste and Hearing and some of them aro adveil bed he was visiting, and his face seemed to down. Even the staid old house dog charge for examination of models or drawings. relieve Headache. Break np Colds in the Head, family." this year for the fii -t time. have lost its expression of confidence, Strengthen the Voice and Ey Punfr. Kfrniat seems to rejoice with them, and jumps Advice by mail free. "Why, I have seen several young and Render Clear and Active eveiy Organ of the WANTED! Ladies and Gentlemen, to ergage and he would sit down on his hind legs Patents obtained through ns are noticed in and barks and snaps playfully at the It uses small uo\r nsive ctrd, men call so often that I took them for Head and Throat Price, 50 cents. with us to Bell several Useful lfotmcholri the SCIENTIFIC AMERICAN, which has and look at the corn as though it was big feathery flakes as they fall softly in Article**. Profits larg-e. Labor in llelit. boarders." never fails to bind ovetj hund'o ami DIAMOND the largest circulation, and is t'ae most influential castor oil or blue pills, but his trainer Exclosive territory given. No competi the twilight, only ceasing" "Oh, no, they are nothing but bill newspaper of its kind published in the is the LIGHTEST BHAUGHT, ton Terms liberal Circulars FREE Addres, and backer would encourage the hog by "Only ceasirr to chaw playfully on INVIO-ORATOR. world. The advantages of such a notice every collectors' Three come one day and Hewitt Mannfaot'g Co., Box 868, Pitthbnreh, Pa. MOST BUUABLE ANB BEST telling him the eyes of the woild were i^ patentee understands. the leg of a tramp as is sneakin' softly four on the next, and I suppose they, Kvory Diamond Iit.Tio-ato la FINISHED MACHINE in tho This large and splendidly illustrated newspaperis uponTrim, and to weaken now would A NEW CURE FOR into the barn in the bootiful twilight" are trying to wear out my lady's patience." a Perfect Blood Purifier, A tizer and published WKEK1Y at $8 20 a year, maiket. cause betting men to forever lose confidence Nerve Tonic* It makta a delightlnl. whole "Within tho farm-house the lamps POTATORU and is admitted to be the best paper devoted some drink, which Invigorates, Purifies in hogs, and the pride ot the hog aie burning brightly. The aged grandfather Any one Vio buys tho DEEEI. to science, mechanics,inventions, engineering "Doesn't it annoy her?" and Strengthens the entire sjaiem would be touched and he would get up woiks, and other departments of industrial draws his arm-chair closertothe For General Debility, Dyspepsia, Biliousness. BINDER avoids every chance of tiouble "Not a bit. Do you notice that they progiess, published in any country. Single Torp Liver, Indigesti iNenra gio and 1 tieumatio and paralyze the bushel of coin amid ample fire-place, and" are all well dressed, good-looking men, or failuie in the harvest. Aflections, Janndice, Malaria, Flatnlencr, copies by mail, 10 cents. Sold by all newsdealers. the applause of the other hogs On the "An' swares that the storm ain't a and we really flatter ourselves that the AND ALL TROUBLESOME VERMIN. usea, foick Heauaclie and Kidney Complaints, twenty-fifth day the hog struck, and MANUFACTURED BY it is invaluable. Price, 60 cents. circumstance to th' big snow that cum neighbors take them for artists and diamond Address, Mnnn & Co., publishers of Scien Pife sura, clpanlv and cheap. Sample Packase. PiitPiid William BeerfiLg, wouldn't shell his corn Previous to Ask your Druggist for then Rmed on the 17th of November, eighteen 30 cts AGFST3 WA\TED Address, *ific American, 261 Broadway, New York. brokers who want our custom." les and take no oth^rt or will bo en% that he had taken it from the cob by HjtfMkbook about patents mailed free. V 3KC. Johnston^ Plttsbnrah, Pa- hundud an' 'leven Wall Street News. Pree on receipt of price. placing his feet on the ear of corn and "The farmer'sbuxom daughterscheerfully CHICAGO. ^Descriptive Pamphlets Free. IIUSSOAL INSTRUMENTS THE MILLER BROS.CUTLERY CO. gnawing the kernel off, but now he insisted prepare the abundant evening Addrer Dr. Evor-'a Diamond Remedlos u^ Manufacturer a!t.o 'gUO S free Address,choap. RICHAP on having it shelled, and his 111 3BBCatall of kinds for sale very meal" a MBRIDEN, CONN. P. O Box 83fl0. 104 John Street New YorK, Th Beering light Reaper, The Beeutg &*d ^-mot backer shelled it The hog had difficulty What Next Will a Girl Do? "Cold poik an' pertaters and pie," in getting it down even then, and HULL & CO BOX 868, Pittsburgh, Pa. A verv pretty society belle called the "The farmer and his boys gather Mowers, and Tha kide? kprb. he was not the devil-ma\-care hog that other afternoon, in all the glory of a round the groaning board, their' he had been at the beginning ot the fresh toilet, on another and very stylish "Their butes smellin' considabul hos- LYDIA E. PINKHAM'8 match. On the twenty-seventh dav the society belle. The servant thought that sy." STANDARD POCKET CUTLERY, M2S BR31 $ CUTLER. VEGETABLE COMPOUND. hog struck again, and insisted on having the lady was at home, and so invited "And talk of the storm and of the Ladies' Scissors and In Erasers. the corn boiled, and that was done her caller into the parlor. Then the IsaPosHiveCure work for the morrow. It will be just Make allstylos of for him, and he got along well until the servant disappeared up stairs to find "it'EEL PENS. the day to go to the wood lot says the WHOLESALE for all these FalafM Oesnlatats We1nts last day, when his teeth were soie, and her mistress. The young lady was not ocooustoa te*urbes*fBMi**sdatlen. farmer ana they must not forget to Druggist3, CAN I OBTAIN A PATENT he had not the pluck to tackle boiled to be found. On her way down stairs It will cure entirely the worst formof StanaleCeraplaints, take a load of wood to the poor widow o-? cutofr-atentAdjustableQuillActionReservoir Pt*, all ovariantroubles,Iaflammatton and 01cr* Send a mueh *ketfh If on mrxlol of 3 anr corn. He sat on his haunches, and held with this information the servant was 1 hecm3|"andwUmAUtamplegTOfsottreceIptofta in the valley, and" invention iubOKl, 1 L. VIO^, luiliincon, tlon, Hailing- and DIsplaesnMnts, endthe contsausnt his head up, with his mouth open, and startled by loud shrieks from the parlor. I*.C, mi lHl*r^limiiiarv ft.xuiuinuUon "An' send the parson a cord o' crooked Spinal Weakness, and la particularly adapted to th* will tx-miulea ail Luutd buns intents of the his backer shoveled in the corn, and as INVENTIONS I MTHAVE BfcfcA KfcJfctftk Running rapidly down the broad stairway Change of Life. tops, that won't sell, to offset the same C1H-.S of in\ -ii ons an I jimwi teauvlar may still, most ages, be patented by us Beinj the last shovel full went the way of the ana into the parlor she found the whether or not &pu eutun he obtained. It will dissolve andeKpeltaaserafmrnttienterMlB pew rent, and so keep solid with th' Almighty." oppoeitethe U. 8. 'atent Office, aad engaged ft sr=~Oj v-We line of Pens will bo sold by the trade previous thirty bushels, a great cheer ST. PAUL, pretty caller perched on the highest an early stage of development. The tendencytocan MINN FOKTUIS rKKT.r*TTVARY EXAMINA- PATENT BU8INW 8KXCLUS1V ELY, we can se. b-j-ir ee Lits furnished to dealers on application. TION NO CaAxiOt. Ii MADE. core patentsin les tine than thoje who are re ceronshumorsthereischeeked veryspeedilybyItsoae arose, and the Long Island Pointer hog chair in the room, her skirts gathered "And after supper he goes out to the mete from Washin (tun and who mast depend up What will a Patent Cost? It removesfalnrnsss,flatulency,deetroyaaU craving was declared the winner of the greatest closely around her, her eyes filled with OB the mails!n all transactions with the Patent stable and gives his pet bay colt some forstimulants, and relievesweakness oftheetomaoh"" match on record, except that of the Office CHAKGE UNLESS tears, and the air filled with piercing O It euros Bloating, Headaches, Kervons Prostration, extra bedding, and" N quail eater of New York. But the hog When Inventor** modelor sketeb we make It jronam^dvleed that your imeat'onfeputent. screams. The maid was puzzled for a General Debility, SUsplsstnsei, Depression and Indigestion. mn "An' cusses considable a tryin' to git sssreh in the Pateot i tffice aad advise asto its pa. able.swatl SttO u. puv (iu eminent Hrplicationt fainted away, and it was only by an moment "Take him away! Take him 166u*o of #19, and 44 tor tue drawings rvquired by th teuUbility vti'i BABSC CorresponJencecon. the las' fall burdocks outer his tail." That feeling of bearing down,oaasing pain,weight Uo* t-rnmoitt Thui Inpa abl ben a pliratla ia immediate application of swill that his S^.VSliP1 away!" shrieked the pretty belle. Then "The girls go to the window and matlr and la all of theexpenre .tn'esi a patent Ual~ andbackache,isalwayspermanently eared byIts use. TENT IS OBTAl* ED. life was saved. It was a victory, however, the maid looked at the base of the animated towed When allowed theatiouitj giei ,%25 and Tt It wUlatalltunesand underei! circumstancesactIn watch the falling flakes, and talk of We refer to Hon. itmasterGeneral Key, the tlnal Government 1rtt.*2a is iiyablc lhos and the backers of the Milwaukee statue and perceived a diminutive harmony with thelaw* thatgovernthefemalesystem. ^ev. Powder, official* in the 17. 8 Pstent you know bcforehina./ar NoUtiF.whether ycu a quiltings and candy pulls and straw hog are willing to back him against Offiee, and especially .o oar clients in every State Koinrf to et a pnU-iit OP not and no attorney f* Skye terrier, who was mildly gazing Fortbecureof KidneyComplaints of either ass this rides' rHcliarzed onleat vou do rot J*at-nt An alfornej of theUnion and in .aada. For special referen anything of the kind in New York, push Compound Is unsurpassed. at the excited young lady above whosa r 4tep*nd on lii BUOCIMS In obtaining a ces, terms,advice, ft Address "Now yer shoutin'," said the driver. eUhettJudcTOoiuc-iiiai'yoIiuatnat ITDU E. PINSnAMng YTOBTABUC COMroom shots barred. No one has watched the Patent will not advise your Inveiit.ou ia him. The terrier was promptly taken C. A. snow 4c Co., "Y've struck yer gait" ftUntable unleaaUieahy patentable so far a*. Is prepared at an end Western Aveaae. progress of the quail eater of New York Opposite Pat'at office. Wash away, the weeping damsel descended determinint theqac^l I*nn,lta*s. Pricef Sixbottlesforgs. Seatbymall "And so the night closes in upon the (Ion hence youcan relyoathrr.d\lseKl\ciittrteV with greater interest than the backers and departed, andan aristocratic neighborhood lathe form of pOls, also lathe form of loesages,oa a prellminiry *i a nitlo-i le h\d Dala Put- happy household. The supper dishes of the stock-yard hog.Peck's Sun PEOPLE WHO LIVE was once more at peace M**i 5^ tueRr^btrationof 1 ~currdb ikrU 4vcailT a radft pre receipt of price, ft perbos foreither. KM. Ftakham UM^M are cleared away the farmer smokes freelyanswersalllettersoriaauky. lead for paatph* Br the line of aad aearte the old8T. PAUL i pared and file Ap i'ie*t on* in r*vi*or ot fte* his pipe by the fire the good mother sits SIOUX ClTT RAILROAD and its varioaa leteal,AlMai*tnavHl.or rrfci*iCaeU!ad knitting by his side" Very otlen valUiioU mv ufonaaresfved intae Branch Lines, BOW apart of the An Incipient Legislator. Ho family should UrtthoutLrniAS. PWKHAIFS An Orang-Outang Accepting Fate. Classen of cases If vo* hn\ undertaken to lemn Chicago, St^aul,Jtfinne- "Blue-striped mittens fur the boys." IIYSR FILLS. They eons eottsttpatlea, WMoeineas For some time past Mr. Haze has your owo patent aiul failed, a jsMU'ni l)iiid}ingof The largest orang-outang ever brought tbecase may lea I UJMIUTS kena me a written raqtiftad1rewd "The children steal off sleepilytobed aad. torpidity of theHver. tt cents per box. arsa suspected his son Willie of having Congressional to the (or-tmlHuoner of Patcuu to this country was received a few days tO- sold by all Drug-glsta. to dream of the pleasures of the morrow. &>oli & 0n)^t(k Iii\e that he re' -i' /idro-hg I I-MON of WnRhlngton tendencies. The boy had a ago. It is an adult male, and reached O i ro tr&ttt rnor the cane el vine I no Witihout the snow falls steadily. wonderful faculty for finding things title of ticlnt jtloi nd abr tha dit" of fillne here within about six weeks after its Little drifts gather at the windows, and yunt ntipllfri'loi \n ni 1 i*ionind repon reponv.,.lwil know that thieis the short and quick Line to all that were never lost by their rightful postyow tUm. f-p( capture in an African forest, so that it n-uif firtltletolnvfttoons points Centeal and Western Missouri to all larger ones around the horse-block and in fictrin cifo rnlion rr'ating to Patent* owners. Like most incipient legislatois, points in Kansas, Nebriskn Colorado Texas. Is a compound of tho virtue* of sarsaparllla, was as far from being tamed as a wild n-omotlv fu-Q Hei if Patmta milled at doorsteps. One by one the members of tiled e. 1 Willie is a very bright ooy, ana is decidedly California, Arizona New and Old Mexico, and I t) -e^uHr CrO\ ci nmern, siillmgia, mandrakt, \llo\ dock, with it iTfiv. ar-h 5 animal could well be. When the close 'i.hisf a the family go to their peaceful beds. 'hat this is the Only Line between Mianetota mcmb., humorous. Mr. Haze, however, "13I illo,*rtin tlit- iodide of potash aud iron, all powerful front of its box was taken off, the sight mwd the Bomth Went, Sin 1805 ai 1 th"-of r^ep tlj brnefite o The farmerlast of all. He covers the blood-makiug, lilood-tleaiisiug, and hfe-sustaiinng appointed himself an investigating committee experetif" iiw I'MW wnconn be given to actual 1HROLGH7GBEAT CITIES of men aroused it to paroxysms of apprehension rlifiits in aim t overv ntv in the ft eWments It is the purest, safest, fire in the fire place, winds the clock, of one. The session was held Vsuupli "I rt atiij t'll'ateinifrc upon reoe*t and rage. It would alternately and most effectual altcratne medicine and" of thepopnToasaRsTourivaney, namelySieux with closed doors- POWDER known oi a\ailable to the publu TIIP scies squeal like a cornered rat and City, Council BlMffs, Omo ha )THE( "Turns out the dorg an' looks at the "Where did you acquire this?" asked St. fmaeph Jitehteon, eaten of niedn ine and chemistry haw np\r-r Chicago&Worth-Western grunt like an angry boar, var ing its 61" Istu s*. \VASiri\GT(K i C. weather." werfAand ^an tan City kolfrUf,r.of piodiued so valuable a icmfd\, noi one so the chairman of the committee, taking Amciv Attorne-at- T.TTJHH1 vigorous and dissonant remarks upon The St. PaolfcSioux City Railroad, now known "And then, he, too, seeks the repose potuittouue all distasps KsultiiiR fiom can Foreign lattnts a pipe from William's pocket as the Wafer*) MiMtion of the Chicago, St the situation by violently shaking its impute blood It uies Sciofnla and Railway is the that follows honest labor. And then all Paul, MinneapolisfcOmaha Line, Is also the Shor "Found it, sir cage and assuming the most diabolical all scioitilous diseases, Eijsipehis, is quiet, save the low murmur of the and MHrtet Line from Central and Western Min OLD ESTABLISHED SHORT LINE "And this?" added the chairman, unearthing Absolutely Pure. Rose, or %t Anthony's Fire, Punplei, facial expressions. In a couple of dajs, nesota, Westeru Iowa, Dakota Nebraska and the thJ WAIL ROUTE wind through the leafless trees, the soft Ana a pistol. FAS mtl Face-giubs, Pustules, Blotches, Sooth-West to however, it made an exception in favor pelting of the snow on the windows,and 8 WJJfy^K Boils, fumois, letter, Huniois, "Found it, too, sir." This powder never varies A marvel of ST. PAUL, MINNEAPOLIS^ of its keeper, a sturdy German, who halt Rheum, Scald-head, Ring-worm, strenght and wholesomenese. More economic "And where did you get this half dollar CHICAGOo It is the Great Thoroughfare from and supplied its frequent meals of dates, bananas, the hired man in the kitchen and,the entire North and North-West, and to the than the ordinary kinds and cannot be sold I Iceis, Soies, Rheumatism, Meicuri.il "An1 with across on it, that I have been Lumber Districts oi Northern Wisconsin. impetition with the multitude of low test, shor. and egg-yolks beaten up with Disease, ISetualgia, Female Weaknesses At St Pant connections are made with *he chamber a snorin'fittoraise the ruf." weight, alum or phosphate powders Sold onr using as a buck at poker for the last and Inegularities, Jaundice, sugar. Then it began to demonstrate a Jiattern Bivition of the Chicago, St Paul, Min "Driver," said the fat man as he got cans. ROWAL BAKIWO POWDER CO 106 Wa Artections of the Livei, Dyspepsia, four years?" neapolisfcOmaraline, foi Northern and Cei'tial lively curiosity about the strange sights Strt, N. Dec 1 83 And nil points in Northern Illinois, Central, Emaciation, and General Debility. out at Ninth street, "you appear to WHnousin and or Chicago and all points aa&t "Found it, sir, found it." Eastern and Northwestern Iowa, and sounds surrounding it The continual and the running of trains is so arranged that pap SITIONET, have seen something of the country "And my pocket knife I won at a Wisconsin, Northern Michigan, Minnesota, By its st an lung and cleansing qualities *chorus of shrieks, whistles, sengers from the este' Division of thi littj. Dakota, Manitoba, Central and yourself. Eh?" it puigts out the foul oiruptions whuh UPHOLSTERER, raffle, where did you get it?" v-an have from one to one and one half hoars aee screams, and songs from the myriad of Northern Nehrasha, Colorado, Wyoming, i outauunate the blood and cause deiangemeutand "Me? Do I look like a granger? tend to bu iness in St aul if desired "I found it, pa. I'll swear on a stack Utah, Idaho, Montana, Nevada, birds within hearing, the chatter of a Manufacturer of arstsla*-* patior faraitur* as Wlten yam c South or South West be snrfl to de a\ It -uu ulates and euineiiH Naw, sur-ee! I'm a dook in disguise, I California, Oregon, Washington Territory, of Bibles I found it." to over thfe Line through the teven Big- Oltie couple of young dog-faqed baboons in the Mtal funt nons, piomotts euerg\ ami MJriJYGCHAIB,jn.tTTRJ-8 .*A, Brttith Columbia, China, Japan, am. G'long thar, Baby steady, Jim." and when you go north, east or northwest, go "And where did you get this piece of stiength rtstoits und pitsents health, and the cage below it, the antics of a pair of the Sandwich Islands, Australia, JVese O raper iet, mmbreqmima, Mite. through St. aul the Ureat Batlroad New York Sun. Zealand, and all principal points in the infi.sfs in \v hie and \igoi thioughout the leather?" asked the old man, placing lop-eared rabbits in an opposite cage, All kinds of upholstered furniture neatlyrepaird the greatNorthwest wbo'e s\-.jpin No Miifpier fiom atn disen~ NORTH, NORTHWEST and WEST. Willie in a proper position, and hitting Two passenger trains daily, St. Paul to Chicag the automaton-like industry of the men uiscs fiom unpuiit of the With its own lines it traverses North A LARGE STOCK OI" UPHOLSTERED GOODS AND Feminine Logic to the Front. through Elroy and Madison, with Pullman Palac him about forty consecutive times with filling seed and water into the crates of blood mid dtsj i who ill gut, A\Lits ern ILLINOIS, Central and Northern Sleeping Cars on ench train. FURNITURE ALWAYS KKFT ON BAND She was employed on a daily newspaper. a piece of an old bridle rein. "Now, IOWA, WISCONSIN, Northern MICHI- the canaries within full view, all fcAi s\.i i i fjii mil s. THROUGH TICKETS She conceived the idea of making GAN, MINNESOTA, and Central DAKO- Orders by mail promptly attended to. young scoundrel, tell where vou got seemed to have interest for the intelligent It folh lo e\pcinntnt with the numer TA. It offers to the traveler all accommodations a little pleasure trip, and proceeded er this route are on sale at all principal stations that can be offered by any brute, and in cognition over the o.ib low -pi i tiiKttitfh of cheap tnatuials, 453Wacouta, Cor.Eight St., ST. PAUL. to ascertain the sentiment regarding it Be sure and buy a through ticket as they are gen. railroad. Its train service equals that "Please, pa," sobbed the culprit after ^on. PAIN. ami wi'hont udi mil \ntues offcted as enormous problem, "What sort of a of any road: their speed Is as great as erally cheaper: but if you cannot get the tickets from the collective editorial wisdom. bloo I ,ullu while disease bttomes more the session was over, "pleaselockup comfort and safety will permit: they place have I got into?" it appeared to you desire or the "lfcrmation wanted about rates Sawing .Made Easy. She consulted the meteorological editor, CURES iinnh SPVU! \\ius SAKSM VKIILA IS a make close connections in union depots thatstrap oryou'll think I connections, Ac at your home station, write to 'forget both fear and anger. Rheumatism, Neuralgia, Sciatica, im uiiii^ of su coiKcntiated curatne at junction and terminal points with the astronomical editor, the shipping the undersigned, and your letter will receive foundittooboohoo!" wieleadiog railroads of the West and po\ tr lint a is 1 f,u tie best, cheapest, Lumbago, Backache, Headache, Toothacts*, Already it looks with equanimity upon prompt attention. W fEASDALE, editor, the mining editor, the astrological The Mew Improred Northwest, and offer to those that use Willie, who was not hurt much, afterwards Sore Thront.Swelling*. S|r.ln,BrnJav and most miihie blood-pmdier known F. B. CLARKE General Agent, most persons who stop to exchange them editor, the culture editor, the political immm Bnrna, *iraldk. Front Uiteav Gen. Traffic Manager. St Pul Mma told a boy friend that his father Pi \.Hians Inm\ its i omposition, and prest IMAM SPEED, COMFORT AND SAFETY regards with it, and is little likely to prophecy editor, the critical editor, ASD ALL WTriKt BOUILV PA1XS Mt ACHKft. ubf IT It lnsbunwideh ustd for forty could not truthfully say, "Willie, I had .lathe aleawatl and beat A CHICAGO it makes close connection make any other demonstration than an tatdbj DnngliU and Dealartevarrvbere. Vitkf Cwlii taatHa. %t us i has won lhf uuqualiiied confiin the go-as-you-please editor, and the out- lA, haw iliteea yean on missed you," for he didn't miss him at EI1STIC withall other railroads at that city TRUSS Mreetioss la fl I uf uxgn. ostentatious interest in the skylight, to SiiaawtotaJtU(aadeav imPioi iiom has benefited 5 up-all-the-morning- exchanges- before It runs PALACE SLEEPING CARS on all, but hit him every lick.Texas THE CHVJU.ES A. VOt.EI.ER CO, oa MM (Hal 8enr HMaPaadUariacfrmaallotlMi* avoid meeting the too sharp and prolonged anybody-else-sees'em-editor. The unanimous all through trains, PARLOR CARS on its Metel for maatnued Oateleann eea*-tTdjK *TTf-r Prepaed by Dr. J. C. Ayer & Co., A. VOUELEReo nuiUmart,3li^C..A. bcoBtiua^wteS Salf-laWn* Si/lings. SINING rincipal routes, and NORTH-WEsTERN Ms sad full aartleahua. JUnrnwilTSB gaze of a visitor. When a colored Ulla enter, adaetol fawlTtatfl TAKE IT! READ XT I verdict was one of unqualified O4f1forsen5d8 gwarehIJhta^8aw0e.aellaBethSt..0hi*gt OARS on its COUNCIL BLUFFS snUoaa of the body, walk tht i I'lidu .1 nui Aualvtit.il ChetnUt*. man stopped before it a few days Bel hatha no pra-- Mass. approval and undisguised satisfaction. and on its ST. PAUL and MINNEAPOLIS 1 owe Happy Hunting Grounds. lalialamJailaaeL laaeseaaaawea through day express trains. ago it showed pleasure, and appeared The atmosphere grew strangely oheerful. 4 with tte lHbser. ifcjfc* jitot No Fata Tiie Weeklyl ie er Press. If you wish the Best Traveling Accommodations "Observing in the papers of yester- T- |iMMiUwHanJlihaldMe3 to recognize in-him the sort of human tsol^ tV All II MO l-,rs L\EHVWHEnE for She felt that this enthusiastic acquiescence you wlllbuy your Tickets layI stjsl, seta waul ewecartata. Ills stay. danUs day," writes a correspondent, "a notice 4K being it had been used to in his native by this route AND WILL TAKE NONB laacawSTikotayakiU. CM-aftes. with her project was the reverse our FALL OTHER, of the death of W I was reminded Priot-List QCUSTOM TBPgg tXK, CUcago, Ml jungle. Its philosophic acceptance of mxm^&moRT of-complimentary, and with true ffard Fo rates for single or round trip of the following authentic anecdote the new conditions of existence into Nortl tickets and for full Information in re feminine logic she resolved to stay at 1 2. which is currently related of him: ^.to all parts of the West, North and FACTS llrtke FARMER! which it has been thrown, and its readiness home.Boston Traveler. I .Ffcea toany address upon Some years since he was accosted by an to learn all it can of them, make it IS A SURE CURE MiRIETSfcT 0 MERCHANT! I by this Line. application. Coatainsde- fiELUBL SELF-CURE acquaintance with, How do you get an interesting beast J. LAYNG, MARVTN HTJGHITT, for all diseases of tho Kidneys and The Toy Balloon Dangerous. scriptioos of everything Gtn.Snpt. SdVice wjdeiLManaMS along?' 'Not very well I've lost my LIVER MBCELLAJTftrQe MBCHAHIC! W. H. STENNETT, Very few persons are aware of the wife. Everything goes wrong. I want required for Personal or Family use, A fcrorrte efetipii off thsU.aVe of th Gen.Pass Agt,Chicago. lTT llHilrlMrflfB!.-^'' rariiaeafMjr~rln1 dangerous character of the toy balloon Mtsl anil to die and gt todheavenplacI if can get with over 2,200 iUnatratiooa. Wesell **r,miirr mi tlili innet laiiiwiiiii 'Wha kin of a would The Trodden Journal ha discovered there.1 now so extensively sold in the streets. nil goods at Wholesale prices, in wwa, enehling it ta throw agtorjtiity mad 'Hi CHAT S fO CffiUHtO a phenomenona young man, a A few days ago a gentleman struck a you have heaven to be?' asked his interrogator. taaotleOt mtbuvtlmUag tlnhoallliT Mntfamcf ~jJHUWBWDMT nal9* WAOT mam. qnsntities to suit the pnwhi. Th* favorite in society, who dares to say I RE8WMUN0 A.N* ttw SO*, aad by Veeping th* koenria la fte* 'Why, sir,' said W match to light a cigar, and one of these 1 PH. WAMQ 4 OOM JHliiHaa only institution in America who make Only $1.15 Pe that he "cannot afford it"that he Annimi.S balloons, happening to come near the Malaria. who was a good sportsman, 'I would this their special bnsinesB. Address would be pleased to dance the german nnM%&iuMms!i Bureau,**. aaalaria^hmwttaa ekflte. blaze exploded, enveloping his head jni OWI1 A KEW IS. OPWYOWSOf NOTBDlAWia have it a boundless prairie with an every night in the week, if opportunity WJTA-ll a tt* WM rouwfen ftr MOOTWHIERY WAR! A GO *nd face in flame, burning off his eyebrows th ^tntImruMIJaniKBatbc everlasting September, and I'd have tWcttwOlmttafytmJh.^^m.^mmmmm S%z ale lata* Ontav toaaaaawttalyataaa.* were given him but that if costly bou- CLARALOUISE KEUOQG-lttfroM 8ad tax imfi* Oopj. AMnm wmm and a portion of his hair and fbwun toMidairBUM tethelittrtcfe with me an everlasting gun and a never wlifcTniBhn, MV aai sat Wakaak a*awe OManaa,\W imr alinnH Tatia tlniiiiiaa nawn if 1L toomnmnirtft' Lkiadr*rt **4 uets are a necessity, he must forego whiskers. It is very evident these balloons amawthe atlf&nimit aSankjAjkK dying dog." He had Campbell's Indian^ TIQUWWR PBS88 OO^ MBatejOateiaiZlalBfi^Z V XH.DYDIHIOOfT, 4rtoUt tat A BfOBMORZ BUMi pleasure, for his salary is not sumcieutly are filled with a highly taflamjnj. Mtai*faltMBBkairitB lac ka&tat idea that 'his faithful dog should KIDNEV-WOR1 large for him to be able to pay BtPauLlHwu aariaafaMmUtJM. Oniric can* a hie gas. j,^ beer him company,'" for them